The culture isn't comfortable with shared accountability. But the Christian life is marked by it. Learn how it is missing in most marriages, the impact of missing this critical element, and how we can address it.

Why pray? Many preachers and teacher will start with the benefits to praying. And in doing so, focus on us motivating the what: what to do and what we get from doing so. In this response message, I counter by saying all prayer, as all of the Bible, starts with the Who, and if we miss this, we miss the entire purpose and power behind prayer.

The default area most therapist and counselors will guide couples on is communication. This is wrong. Not because communication isn't important, because it is. But communication is not the root. What needs to be discussed from a Biblical perspective is control. This episode we'll talk about the nature of its root and why it is a prevalent challenge, and how to address it.

Freeing Your Mind is so important but can one to it totally alone? I make the case that it’s met to be done both as a solitary journey and in community.

In this teaching, I talk about the Worldly Prisons based on 1 John 2:15-17: I describe the kinds of common prisons we have when we are too much in love with the world.

Free Your Mind - Part 2: The War For Your Mind. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:5). We cover the two ways to begin to protect yourself against worldly indoctrination. 1) Awareness of what indoctrination is; 2) What you need to do to defend against it.

Season 5: Free Your Mind - Episode 1. This introduces the series by asking, Why need a freed mind?

Season 5: Continuing our series on Free Your Mind, we cover today Freedom from the Past. Guess what? Replaying your hurts....is a habit! Listen to learn more about why we do this and how to unhook yourself from this painful self-torture!

Season 5: "Free Your Mind." Many people aren't truly thinking thoughts that are free, but are imposed by others around them. In this episode, we look at one form of imprisonment -- small dwellings. When we dwell on the trivial and the petty, our thoughts and lives shrink. I talk about the antidote in this episode that can give you greater freedom.

Cleaving from Parents is critical to oneness, but many marriages do this wrong. I share some personal pain around this with ways to address this challenge.

You won't have a marriage problem if both of you can follow this one devotional together. Sorry to say, I can guarantee you won't. But it's worth hearing, getting convicted, and digging in together.

Members of the church, now more than at any time, need to have clear ways to discern proper leadership. Without it, there's very little oversight into who becomes a leader, paid or volunter, within a church. Failures can be immediately dramatic. But more likely, there is the "Leaven Effect": the slow, at first imperceptible, erosion of the Gospel. Yet, why is the risk high? It's very easy to accept on faith decisions made by the leadership as "annointings." But in the same way that companies have boards of directors that turn the other way because they have been appointed by the CEO, churches can lack accountability because a clear vector for qualification is missing. This is how wolves enter leadership. Most people think wolves are easily discernible for overtly bad behavior. But Jesus doesn't take that view. In fact, he believes they can be very difficult to detect. As Scriptural literacy continues to fall within the church, evasion, including self-deception by the well-intended, is easy. Meaning: a wolf may not even know he is one due to self-deception and prideful Scriptural illiteracy.

I continue the discussion. This is not medical advice or therapy, but it's food for thought for those in marriages that need help and are either in or contemplating therapy. In this shorter episode, I explore how to think about whether therapy can even be good given its origins, and how to understand the way "expert advice" is often generated so you can be aware.

Often the default motion when there's a challenge in a marriage is therapy. But as I begin to share in Part 1 of this, for Christians especially, most therapy will actually send you into a negative spiral. It did for me, and I begin to make the case for why this is NOT something as a primary resort IF you don't have actual psychological problems (psychosis, addiction, violence).

When you think of the word "leadership," you probably imagine a slew of requirements and characteristics, of which "sound doctrine" is NOT one of them. But I begin the argument that doctrine is the essential, although not sufficient, requirement and foundation to all proper biblical leadership, whether within the church or in the home.

Deception, especially within a marriage, can tear it apart. While both parties can deceive the other and be deceived, we can't ignore the fact that Eve was the one deceived in the Garden and what the implications are. Perhaps we can look at the underlying source to help us manage deception of ourselves, of each other, and by the culture.

Most people interpret the famous verse from Psalm 42 "deep calls to deep" as the relationship between a man in despair crying out to God. And it is certainly the first order interpretation. But doing so misses an opportunity to reflect on how we can better relate to each other, especially within a marriage or a friendship.

What are some take aways the deception in the Garden of Eden by the Serpent for deception in a marriage and how to address them? These aren't what most people associate deception with -- affairs, embezzlement, addictions. I address deception that, even without the presence of these serious issues, can undermine the marriage.

What does it really mean to leave behind your mother and father in a marriage? And how can this discussion identify potential issues before making a decision to marry? This is another "lightning round" so the exegesis and exposition isn't as thorough as I normally would, this is off the cuff so DYOR.

In this "lightning episode" I make the case that Christians have an innate call to grow. This is an essential characteristic not only for oneself, but when looking for close relationships such as friendships and marriage. I cover why it's important and how to tell when you or someone else is not oriented this way and what this can mean for relationships and your walk with Christ.

How can we rethink church planting as a digital message-first approach? In this episode, I start with the foundations of what a church should do, and describe how we are in a message-first era which presents a huge challenge for planters to address common challenges. This was a podcast I recorded on the road so the quality won't be as good.

Third part in a three part series where we look at the core of conflict in marriage. In this episode, you'll learn of a powerful model that can break the cycle of control and shame that runs counter to the "Christian-lite" approach and the culture itself.

In this episode, we continue to look at the nature of sin and temptation according to God's word in the first marriage between Adam and Eve.

Understanding the Core of Conflict in Marriage

Eldership: The Subtle Seduction of the Prosperity Gospel

Wives, are you expressing “the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit?” Husbands, are you using harsh words that invoke anger?

What is the expectation of solid teaching? How can you tell if they have the “right stuff”? Do they actually instruct from Scripture? Do they have the “backbone” to rebuke and correct -- and do so with soundness but also with grace and relational strength? Are they able to take a stand and do so in the face of conflicting ideas and discomfort, or are they “double tongued” and seek to please?

Why the confessing leader reveals the heart and power, and why be cautious of the non-confessing leader.

Marriage Devotional - Contrary and Rule Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you. (Genesis 3:16)

This episode reviews the Communication Spectrum -- a way to evaluate your dating partner based on communication buckets. It's also a way to evaluate yourself and grow in Christ based on your own choice of words with your significant other.

The Elder Mind: Renewed, Sound, and Courageous -- and How to Tell and Develop

This episode states my thesis that the biggest risk to churches being infiltrated by wolves is through poor preparation and vetting of elders. I share a little bit about why elders often are an unexpected source of poor teaching and false prophesy. https://story.ignite-sf.com/elders-wolves-in-the-midst#gs.z2dwa4

In this podcast, I share my thoughts on the real threats to the church and how to find real hope in truth through Christ alone. I do this by asking the question, "If you were the enemy to God and His purposes, what would you do?" The answers may shock you, but hopefully grow your discernment for the rising tide of false teaching in the modern church.

The Catechizing Parents: How Parents Can Plant the Seeds of the Gospel in Their Children

Response to the Ruthless Elimination of Hurry

Paul and Barnabas leave Antioch to settle a dispute about circumcision, and after agreeing they only need to eat properly and abstain from sexual immorality, are sent back to Antioch to share the decision, and the two later split because of John Mark.

Paul and Barnabas preach in Iconium before being stoned, then go to Lystra and Derbe where they are praised then stoned, then returned to Antioch of Syria for a long time with their church.

Paul and Barnabas are sent by the Holy Spirit to Cyprus where Paul blinds a sorcerer, then travels to Pisidia where Paul tells of Egypt, David, John, and Jesus' death and resurrection but are slandered by the Jews but preach to the thankful Gentiles.

Herod kills James and imprisons Peter who escapes, then he dies for making a speech taking glory upon himself instead of towards God.

Peter retells Acts 10, and Barnabas goes to Antioch after the church hears of the Spirit moving there.

Subscribe and Never Miss an Update: https://podcast.ignite-sf.com/e/58zw667n <br/><br/> An angel tells Cornelius, a devout man, to seek out Simon Peter, who has a vision of a sheet falling, and when they meet, the Holy Spirit is poured out on the Gentiles, amazing the Jews.

Saul persecuted Christians, then is converted during his meeting with Ananias, after which he preached powerfully before being persecuted himself, then Peter heals Aeneas and raises Dorcas from the dead?

1 Sentence Summary The believers were persecuted by many, including Saul, and Philip went to Samaria where he preached to Simon and the eunuch, leading them both to believe and be filled with the Holy Spirit. 1 Key Verse “The Holy Spirit said to Philip, “Go over and walk along beside the carriage.”” ‭‭Acts of the Apostles‬ ‭8:29‬ ‭NLT‬‬ 1 Key Insight The Holy Spirit is such great power even the sorcerer Simon desired it, and it is what leads believers to people to share the Good News. 1 Take Away / Action Today and the days to come, how can I live where I follow the Holy Spirit in what to say, whom to approach, where to go?

1-sentence summary Stephen recounts Genesis from Abraham through Moses and Jacob and David and Solomon, and then tells the Jewish leaders they have killed all the prophets, then he is stoned to death. 1-verse takeaway ““You stubborn people! You are heathen at heart and deaf to the truth. Must you forever resist the Holy Spirit? That’s what your ancestors did, and so do you!” ‭‭Acts of the Apostles‬ ‭7:51‬ ‭NLT‬‬ 1-sentence lesson Even today the religious can be deaf, heathen, and disobedient to God's word and truth.

This short teaching reveals my impromptu thoughts on a model for Discipleship, one that is missing or obfuscated by most churches. My approach looks at the Five Fold Spiritual Gifts found in Ephesians. It's one of the foundational content for my course on Eldership, Marriages, and Men's Discipleship.

Breakthrough: What is Your Dead End Driver? (Part 3) Getting stuck is often due to something within us. Yes, there will be certain types of circumstances which we need to face, but deep within us, something keeps spinning us around and around, turning the wheels, and never experiencing change. Find out what those could be in this episode.

Breakthrough: Naming Your Stuck (Part 2) will help you to actually “name” the kind of stuck you have. That sounds strange, to name that kind of stuck you are in, right? But, actually, too many people go through life without really understanding how they are stuck, the “flavor” of “stuck” they are in, so to speak, so never really begin to invite God’s power to breakthrough. In this episode, you’ll find out how.

Breakthrough: Get Unstuck Through God’s Power This 5-part series is about experiencing breakthrough and get unstuck. Being stuck is no fun, and it inhibits growth. But it’s also one of the hardest struggle to get through because there never seems to be a way out. This series starts with how King David encountered God and praised him as “God of the Breakthrough.”

Blog post: https://story.ignite-sf.com/the-hard-truth-about-being-a-wife<br/><br/> Many topics, especially about the Biblical, respectful, submissive, “helping” role of the wife, are extremely volatile, for men and for women, both -- but understandably more so for women. To fruitfully tread upon this topic area, we need to agree on the importance of seeking the truth. Accepting the Truth based on Scripture is hard because God’s truth often doesn’t support our personal rights and does not reinforce our belief in being Right. So any discussion on hard truths ultimately force a confrontation between our desire, our need, our preference to be “right” -- which we can always ultimately justify -- and being in the Truth.

Summary <br/><br/> In this message, I make the case that most families and churches do not cultivate the development of wifehood. And that, as a result, many women enter their marriages without the essential fundamentals. Not only is an an absence of knowledge, but it is a playbook of poor practices that women get from their other mothers, the culture, and often times, from their church. <br/><br/> The irony is that men can’t get off the hook, for Scripture actually places the root responsibility of teaching how to be a wife upon them (I, at least, am playing my part). That responsibility, however, is actually a core reason wifehood isn’t taught well or isn’t actively sought, and as a result, is a deep rooted dilemma. <br/><br/> The dilemma, however, isn’t problematic for its own sake: it uncovers a failure to embrace the Gospel, specifically the church’s relationship to Christ. This elevates both the difficulty of accepting truth and, more importantly, great urgency to understand it deeply.

Proverbs has many verses about the "quarrelsome wife." Is this just a chauvinist "truism" about nagging, and it's just a state of marriage to be expected? Or is there something real behind Scripture's warnings against this? Find out in this episode on the Real Dangers of the Quarrelsome Wife.