Episode 2 : Mindset For Reaching Your Goals
March 31, 2021
Michele Heyward discusses how mindset is pivotal is reaching your goals. With all the planning and accountability, you won't reach your goals without the right mindset.
Hey, everybody, and welcome to mentor Monday, I'm Michele Heyward, the mentor for women of color STEM professionals, and we are still digging in strong for our goals. Yes, we're still gonna focus on goals for the next few weeks, because many of you have realized that you have some really audacious goals, you have the desire to do so much in your career. But you're not sure where to go, where to how to really structure your goals, how to really get them up and running, much less achieved. So first of all, we talked about last week how to go through and really, really what's included in your goals, right, what's included in your goals. But what I want us to look at today is the mindset, the mindset that you have to have, in order to reach your goals, and I'm gonna share with you something, edit, share it with people in a long time, these are 5k race numbers, that I did Oh, back in between 2010 and 2012. And I had a goal at one point in time to do like 13 or 12 5k races in a year. Now, was I in the best shape, had I ever run? No, those were my goals to do multiple 5k races, do you know I achieved it, but it was simply because of my mindset, and not necessarily my physical well being. And that's what's important. That's really, really what's important is your mindset. Mind over matter really does make it make it easier, and even possible for you to achieve your goals. So number one, believing yourself. And many like Michelle, I have never done this, right down to banks that you have done, you have already achieved what many people no matter their race and gender have not done which is obtain a stem degree, right? Where you like this in your freshman engineering class and look to your left, look to your right, only one of you will be left. And when it comes to people of color, it is one out of six, not one out of three, it is one out of six, that will make it to their four year degree, you have already won, you have already accomplished so much, just by being a stem professional. And having that degree, many have not done so. So that is a huge accomplishment. That is a huge accomplishment. So that is one thing many of us have many of you have up and relocated moved away from your family, maybe you moved to a huge city, and you're from a small town, maybe you're from a huge city and moved to a small town or a smaller city. So you've both gone through cultural changes. And you are doing things differently than other people you know, in your circle. Guess what, that is an achievement You should be proud of. A lot of people refuse to move, they are afraid. They don't know what's on the other side of the interstate or the other side of the state line or the river. So it's truly truly important that you really say you know what, I did do that. I did leave. I did move on. Yes, that is a huge accomplishment. And for others of you, you are still doing great things, whether it's volunteering, it is doing voter registration, you have other accomplishments, which you're like, oh, everybody does that. No, everybody does not. You're truly doing different things. And if you don't believe me, ask them your friends, post on Twitter, post on Instagram, ask people what do they think that you've done differently and they will tell you take something your friends, they will let you know how much you have accomplished that you just figured everybody does. It's a part of what you do, and it really really isn't okay. Number two, if you can see it, you can achieve it. If you can see it, you can achieve it. I literally want you to take a pen and I'm reaching for some paper and a sheet of paper and draw what it looks like what is your goal look like? You can do it in AutoCAD. You can do it in Canva, whatever that
is. You can even do A vision board. But what does it look like when you achieve that goal? Or goals? What does it look like? Because when you can see where you want to be, it makes so much sense. If you can see it, you can achieve it. That's why they call them vision board. And people are more likely to achieve something. If their Look, if they know where they're trying to go. And they have that clear vision, you don't know what's in between where you are now. And where you want to be that destination you don't, none of that is filled in. But when you know, this is where you're supposed to be where you're trying to go, it makes it so much easier, you're less likely to give up. So literally create a vision board, take some magazines, if you're like me, you have some egg magazines, yes, in essence, you might have some ASE American scientists and engineers, whatever it is, take those magazines and cut them up. And really make it maybe the cover of a book because you want to write the next book and be featured in the book, whatever it is, take that and make it real. a glue stick of glue is really cheap. You could also do the same thing on a Pinterest board. So we talked about Pinterest. We're talking about physically putting together a vision board. You can also do Canva or something like AutoCAD to really draw them together. Yes, pull them together. Yes. So when you have that vision, if you can see it, you can achieve it. Number three, fear does it make you stop? I do not believe people are fearless. I do not believe people are fearless. This is what I believe. I believe your dreams. You your dreams are truly a goal with a deadline or a date, write a due date are greater than your fears. Your Dreams are greater than your fears. And what what this means to me what I've come up with when your fears are greater than your dreams, you will do one or two things, you will keep walking or your run like hell. When your fear is greater than your dreams, you want to stand like hell. And you're gonna be really, really, really, really mad and hating on other people which goes into a bonus. So your fear like Michelle Well, how do I overcome the fear? How badly do you want it? How badly do you continue to, to dream about this and look at that vision board and look at that Pinterest board and go I really, really want this. But I'm afraid when that dream becomes greater than that fear, guess what, you will still be scared. But guess what, you still want to do it. Think about all the things you did when you were scared. All the things you shouldn't have been doing and you did them anyway. And you were scared. This is something that you really, really want. And you're afraid you're scared. Do it anyway. What is the worst that can happen? And sometimes that's what you have to do. You have to write down what is the worst thing that can happen in order for you to manage the fear, what is the worst thing that will happen? So I one of my friends went skydiving, he knew not heat, he texts me when he was about to go. Because he knew I was not the person to tell he was about to go skydiving. Because I would have come up with 5011 reasons like you're gonna jump out of a perfectly good plane. So that's not you don't call me when you go skydiving. But you have to write down and literally write down next to that vision that you created. What is the worst that could happen? What are the fears that you have about achieving that? And next to that write down? How do you overcome those fears or obstacles that you have? Because that fear is truly an obstacle. So how do you minimize it so that you can continue to reach that dream? Right? You can you can achieve that goal. That's what I like. Yes, I manage my fear that way I write the worst that could happen. Yes. And people don't realize writing it down is like well that's it that's all that's the worst is all I can do this. Because after you realize what's the worst that's gonna happen. You get over it, you deal with it and you move on. It is quiet. All right. Okay. Now, what do we have next? What do we have next? This is something that I got from Grant Cardone. And if you don't know Grant Cardone that is quiet. Okay. He had a post somebody posted on Instagram.
Um,
probably about a month. month ago, something that grant had in relation to haters aren't haters, they're really quitters. So what does that mean haters are really quitters. So what according to Grant Cardone people who are hating on you aren't really hating, they gave up, they could have been better at you better than you. They could have kept, if it had they kept going, they would have done it better than you. But you know what they did, they stopped. And because they stopped, guess what? They looking at you and you kept going, you kept going. And that is truly, truly important. So you're going to have people that are going to talk negative to you, that are gonna say negative things behind your back. But you know what happened, they gave up, you didn't end because you kept going, you persevere, you're going to win. So the end of the day, don't worry about the haters who are really quitters. Because you got this, and it's really, really important that you know this, and you don't let those people stop you from going from where you want them to be, where you want to be. So Shelly elder, who else came in here, Stevie, Heather, thank you, ladies for joining me, what I really, really want to remind all of you when it comes to your goals or anything in life, your mindset, your belief that you can do it has to be greater than you realize. It truly truly does. It cannot be it cannot be only focus on, on what you think you can do. What you feel you can do, what others tell you you can do. It has to be centered, or what you believe you can do. And then some, because sometimes we set smaller limits because we feel safe with this dream. But we know our reality, our dream is so far out, right? Is this far out. And we're like, I don't know if I can do that. But if I do this, I'll feel okay. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't play it safe. Do the uncomfortable work, do the uncomfortable work. Because at the end of the day, what you're going to find out is you will feel so much better about yourself for not having given up for not having stopped when you get sick and you're tired, sit down, take a rest. It is okay but continue to get back up. So here are the things you need to know about your mindset. Number one, believe in yourself because you truly can do it. Number two, if you can see it, you can achieve it. So make that visual of what it looks like when you're on the other side when you have achieved that goal. Number three, fear doesn't make you stop. Not that your fear list. This is your dreams. Your Goals are greater than your fear and quitters were quitters? What are haters, haters are really quitters and they just looking at you like you never stopped you never gave up. And it's truly important that you do not give up on your goals. Alright everybody, I'm Michele Heyward mentor to other women of color STEM professionals so that you can go further in your career because your career is extremely important not only to you, but to those around you whom you inspire. I'll talk to you next week for another mentor Monday.
is. You can even do A vision board. But what does it look like when you achieve that goal? Or goals? What does it look like? Because when you can see where you want to be, it makes so much sense. If you can see it, you can achieve it. That's why they call them vision board. And people are more likely to achieve something. If their Look, if they know where they're trying to go. And they have that clear vision, you don't know what's in between where you are now. And where you want to be that destination you don't, none of that is filled in. But when you know, this is where you're supposed to be where you're trying to go, it makes it so much easier, you're less likely to give up. So literally create a vision board, take some magazines, if you're like me, you have some egg magazines, yes, in essence, you might have some ASE American scientists and engineers, whatever it is, take those magazines and cut them up. And really make it maybe the cover of a book because you want to write the next book and be featured in the book, whatever it is, take that and make it real. a glue stick of glue is really cheap. You could also do the same thing on a Pinterest board. So we talked about Pinterest. We're talking about physically putting together a vision board. You can also do Canva or something like AutoCAD to really draw them together. Yes, pull them together. Yes. So when you have that vision, if you can see it, you can achieve it. Number three, fear does it make you stop? I do not believe people are fearless. I do not believe people are fearless. This is what I believe. I believe your dreams. You your dreams are truly a goal with a deadline or a date, write a due date are greater than your fears. Your Dreams are greater than your fears. And what what this means to me what I've come up with when your fears are greater than your dreams, you will do one or two things, you will keep walking or your run like hell. When your fear is greater than your dreams, you want to stand like hell. And you're gonna be really, really, really, really mad and hating on other people which goes into a bonus. So your fear like Michelle Well, how do I overcome the fear? How badly do you want it? How badly do you continue to, to dream about this and look at that vision board and look at that Pinterest board and go I really, really want this. But I'm afraid when that dream becomes greater than that fear, guess what, you will still be scared. But guess what, you still want to do it. Think about all the things you did when you were scared. All the things you shouldn't have been doing and you did them anyway. And you were scared. This is something that you really, really want. And you're afraid you're scared. Do it anyway. What is the worst that can happen? And sometimes that's what you have to do. You have to write down what is the worst thing that can happen in order for you to manage the fear, what is the worst thing that will happen? So I one of my friends went skydiving, he knew not heat, he texts me when he was about to go. Because he knew I was not the person to tell he was about to go skydiving. Because I would have come up with 5011 reasons like you're gonna jump out of a perfectly good plane. So that's not you don't call me when you go skydiving. But you have to write down and literally write down next to that vision that you created. What is the worst that could happen? What are the fears that you have about achieving that? And next to that write down? How do you overcome those fears or obstacles that you have? Because that fear is truly an obstacle. So how do you minimize it so that you can continue to reach that dream? Right? You can you can achieve that goal. That's what I like. Yes, I manage my fear that way I write the worst that could happen. Yes. And people don't realize writing it down is like well that's it that's all that's the worst is all I can do this. Because after you realize what's the worst that's gonna happen. You get over it, you deal with it and you move on. It is quiet. All right. Okay. Now, what do we have next? What do we have next? This is something that I got from Grant Cardone. And if you don't know Grant Cardone that is quiet. Okay. He had a post somebody posted on Instagram.
Um,
probably about a month. month ago, something that grant had in relation to haters aren't haters, they're really quitters. So what does that mean haters are really quitters. So what according to Grant Cardone people who are hating on you aren't really hating, they gave up, they could have been better at you better than you. They could have kept, if it had they kept going, they would have done it better than you. But you know what they did, they stopped. And because they stopped, guess what? They looking at you and you kept going, you kept going. And that is truly, truly important. So you're going to have people that are going to talk negative to you, that are gonna say negative things behind your back. But you know what happened, they gave up, you didn't end because you kept going, you persevere, you're going to win. So the end of the day, don't worry about the haters who are really quitters. Because you got this, and it's really, really important that you know this, and you don't let those people stop you from going from where you want them to be, where you want to be. So Shelly elder, who else came in here, Stevie, Heather, thank you, ladies for joining me, what I really, really want to remind all of you when it comes to your goals or anything in life, your mindset, your belief that you can do it has to be greater than you realize. It truly truly does. It cannot be it cannot be only focus on, on what you think you can do. What you feel you can do, what others tell you you can do. It has to be centered, or what you believe you can do. And then some, because sometimes we set smaller limits because we feel safe with this dream. But we know our reality, our dream is so far out, right? Is this far out. And we're like, I don't know if I can do that. But if I do this, I'll feel okay. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't play it safe. Do the uncomfortable work, do the uncomfortable work. Because at the end of the day, what you're going to find out is you will feel so much better about yourself for not having given up for not having stopped when you get sick and you're tired, sit down, take a rest. It is okay but continue to get back up. So here are the things you need to know about your mindset. Number one, believe in yourself because you truly can do it. Number two, if you can see it, you can achieve it. So make that visual of what it looks like when you're on the other side when you have achieved that goal. Number three, fear doesn't make you stop. Not that your fear list. This is your dreams. Your Goals are greater than your fear and quitters were quitters? What are haters, haters are really quitters and they just looking at you like you never stopped you never gave up. And it's truly important that you do not give up on your goals. Alright everybody, I'm Michele Heyward mentor to other women of color STEM professionals so that you can go further in your career because your career is extremely important not only to you, but to those around you whom you inspire. I'll talk to you next week for another mentor Monday.