you're listening to the that's Life podcast by Richard Butler where I talk about everything to do with life and how to make it better. Hey, how's it going? 

It's Richard Butler from Richard Butler dot Coach and in this video podcast, I want to talk to you about how an experience I had in a hotel made me think about life differently. I'm sure you're a little bit intrigued to know about this experience in a hotel, but it's not what you think. So, back in, well, back in May, back in june we stayed in a lovely hotel in Andorra which is just between Catalonia and France. And the hotel was interesting because it wasn't overly packed and when you got out of the left, the passageway was dark and it was kind of, it was a little bit mm you felt a little bit uneasy because you could only see a few steps in front of you. 

But the interesting thing was that as you took the next step and the next step more was illuminated as the lights were turned on by a sensor and every time we got a little bit further we could see a little bit further. And then that led me to believe, well, I know that there is nothing to fear because as I progress down the corridor, the light is gonna shine and I'm going to be able to see where I'm going now. 

Of course this is a story that I'm telling you it's a true story, but it's a metaphor for when we are fearful because sometimes we stop ourselves doing things because we say we can't see where this is going to end, or we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. But let me ask you a question what if we weren't meant to see the light at the end of the tunnel, But just to see the light that will show us that there is something out there and we have to have the faith that as we step forward and move forward in our journey, that what we need to do next is going to be illuminated. I think if we could take that perspective on life, it would make us do more things. Because you see a lot of us are frightened to do things. 

A lot of us say I can't see what's ahead of me and you stop taking action. And I'll admit that that actually happened to me up to a couple of months ago, I was working a full time job in Spain. It's a luxury to have a wild paid job in spain. And while it was a very good job, it didn't fulfill me. It didn't, it didn't make me happy. And I believe inside in my my soul, that one has to be happy in life. 

I mean, look at it this way, we have what, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80 years on this planet and we don't know how long we have because we don't know what's going to happen and imagine that you struggle through life or even if you don't struggle, imagine that you work your ass off And you say, once I'm 60, I'm going to take early retirement and I'm going to live their life and your work, work, work, work, work and you don't go out with your family or you go on holidays and you're checking your emails and you're always available for the company. And then what happens if you don't reach that retirement age and you don't have the resources to live the way you want, You've saved up all this money and God forbid something happens to you or your partner and you can't live that life that you wanted. In that case, one could say surely it would have been better to live a good life every single day and enjoy life every single day rather than accumulating all of this joy until the end, until what we're told, once you retire, you can live the life of your dreams. 

But once I, once I retire, what happens if I I don't have mobility problems and I can't live the life of my dreams. So I was, you know, I always knew deep down in my, my soul that A 9-5 job was not for me and I'd come from education, which was a lot, a lot different to the corporate world and I spent In total probably just over 11 years in the corporate world and probably about a little bit more 12, 13 years within the educational sector. And deep down, I always knew that there was more, but I was afraid because I couldn't see their next steps. And while I had the support of some amazing people, I just couldn't see that next step. And then I thought, I think with Covid and I know a lot of people have felt like this with covert, I readjusted myself even more to the point that I thought, look, if I don't do it now, I'll never do it. And the really scary part is that experience and age is not really that valued in spain, and I'm being honest here, Once you hit over 45, you know, you're not gonna be walking into another job if you lose your job or you're leaving your job, a lot of employers were preferred to actually employ somebody younger. And yes, I do know that that's a fact, having worked in the recruitment industry, it is more difficult for older people to get jobs. In contrast, I know people in Ireland and the UK Who left the job at 50 and they were able to go into another job and at a good pay rate. Now, I knew that once I left my full time permanent job, there was no going back why? 

Because I could say that nobody would employ me or I wouldn't get the type of money that I know I deserve. So I made sure that I had that first step, that I could see just a little bit ahead and I have been, I've been out of my, my full time position for what coming up to, I can't even remember april may june july august, it's going to be five months in september and I'm doing what I love, which is I'm making videos like this, I'm reaching out to people, I'm coaching people to help them work through challenges that they may have in their life and step by step, the light is starting to shine and things are becoming illuminated and I'm trusting in my own abilities, my own way of communicating with people that more and more lights are gonna shine and they're gonna get brighter and so far, I have to say, you know things have gone well, but that's not the point of the video to say that I have been doing well. The point of the video is to say to you that don't live in darkness, don't live in fear. And even if there is darkness, take the first step, think of those automatic lights that go on as you walk, it can be scary because you look down this passageway and it's all dark and you're kind of like, oh my God, what am I gonna do? Do I run back to the elevator where the light is there, but then you see the elevator doors are closing and the light is closing as well, or do you say okay, I'm gonna trust that things are gonna work out. Obviously there's a lot of work that you and I would have to do in the background to get you to this point. But you have to trust that as you move forward, the light is going to switch on, but you are responsible for moving forward. And I think this is probably something that can be quite tricky for people to realize that they are responsible for their life. 

And that sort of, it hit home with me this week as I was being coached by somebody that I was saying, well, you know, sometimes I think in, in august can be difficult to get motivated because august is really slow in spain, it's holiday time. And the person stopped me and they said, hey, do you see what you're doing there? You're taking the blame away from yourself and you are saying, well, things are a little bit slow because of external factors. And how often do we let external factors affect our mood affect our state that we say it's raining and you get into a bad mood. Well, the rain is neutral. Everything really, when you think about it in life is neutral, it depends on how you decide to react to that particular, stimulate The old example of somebody beeps the horn and neutral and say fuck off, you're in the car. And there were people in june there were beeping at their friend on the street. But you allowed a reaction to occur from that stimuli from that stimulus stimulus to me like, um so let me, let me ask you two questions and I'd be interested to know your comments below. 

I'll reach out to me on D. M. Are you afraid to move into the light? Because you can't see further than a few feet. Maybe you want to change job? Maybe you want to ask your boss for a raise. Maybe you want to change partners? Who knows? But you have to say, well, am I brave enough to move into the light and to know that it's better to be alone for a while than to be in an unhappy relationship or to be unhappy in your job. So that's the first question. And the second question which you need to sit down and reflect on his, do you do you blame external circumstances for where you are? I'm not happy in my job because my boss is X. Because the pay is why? Because whatever. And I I blamed external factors. But I didn't have the balls to actually say, okay, I'm going to take control of my life and I'm going to leave. It took me probably 18 months to get the balls to do that. But now that donors, I'm happier I wake up without an alarm. I'm serious about this. I wake up without an alarm and I go down to my office by 10:00. I work until eight every night at least. But I'm actually happier because I'm doing it for me and it step by step because success comes by building a foundation and moving up and from september, I'm going to be running some workshops on topics that are really going to help you and I probably actually run these workshops for free now, just because our free doesn't mean That's going to be crappy. You are kind to get so much value out of these workshops, but is that something you're interested in? I mean, are you interested in closing off 2021 On a high note, Are you happy just to continue where you are? Well, it's up to you to decide. Let me know in the comments below what you think, reach out to me if you would like to talk about coaching and I will see you on one of my workshops if you enjoyed this podcast and make sure that you subscribe and check out my website. Richard Butler dot Coach. I'll see you next time