Life Transformation Radio's episode today features a candid conversation between host Rob Actis and guest Chris Cownden. The episode delves into the theme of overcoming self-doubt and low self-esteem, despite external recognition of one's talents. Rob introduces Chris, a former chef who transitioned to marketing and podcasting after a career-ending injury. The conversation revolves around Chris's struggles with self-doubt and low self-esteem, rooted in past experiences that have shaped his perspective on his own capabilities.

Rob commends Chris for his resilience and pivot after the injury, and encourages him to celebrate his wins and recognize his impact on others, despite his self-doubt. Together, they explore the impact of surrounding oneself with successful and influential people, the importance of authenticity and vulnerability, and the power of podcasting in addressing sensitive topics and fostering meaningful conversations.

The episode also touches upon the influence of past trauma on present behavior and outlook on life. Chris reflects on the need to let go of the past and embrace positive changes, acknowledging the ongoing journey of self-love and self-discovery. As a listener, one can witness Chris's dedication to personal development and seeking mentorship, showing his commitment to improving his self-confidence and self-worth.

In summary, this episode of Life Transformation Radio is a heartfelt exploration of overcoming self-doubt, embracing personal transformation, and finding the courage to celebrate wins and seek personal growth. Chris's candid reflections and dedication to self-improvement serve as a source of inspiration for listeners on their own transformative journeys.

About Chris:
 

After getting hired by AppSumo four months after his podcast launch in 2021, Chris Cownden has been on a mission to empower more career changers and full-time professionals to unlock their full career potential with podcasting. 

 

Founder, Podcast Launch Agency 

Official AppSumo Ambassador 

 

 

https://podcastlaunchagency.com/about-us/ 

https://chriscownden.co.uk 

Transcript:

Chris Cownden [00:00:01]:
And there's a lot of people that say that, oh, you're great at this, you're great at this, this is what your, hidden hidden talent is, is community building and relationship building and connecting people and then but I think everybody everybody out there has that self doubt but everybody else, you see the magic and the hidden talents and you tell somebody that they're great it really does help but I don't know I've struggled to believe everything that people tell me, because I don't believe it myself. But I guess I'm on that journey of self love and self discovery still.

Intro [00:00:40]:
This is Life Transformation Radio. Prepare to engage. Chris Cowden, my friend, all the way across is it across the pond? Is that what I say? Across the pond? All the way across the pond. Welcome to Life Transformation Radio.

Chris Cownden [00:01:22]:
Oh, thank you for having me back, Rob.

Rob Actis [00:01:25]:
Absolutely. So, you know, it's Rob, Actus and Friends. So people say you have a lot of your friends and I go, I do. Because I like to show how they are transforming in their lives. And it's fun to talk to friends. I like that. So welcome.

Chris Cownden [00:01:40]:
Thank you so much.

Rob Actis [00:01:42]:
How are you doing?

Chris Cownden [00:01:44]:
I am keeping myself busy.

Rob Actis [00:01:46]:
I love that. So if you didn't listen to part 1, we talked a lot about how you used to be a chef and you transitioned from being a chef to a marketer, a podcaster, and just an all around great guy.

Chris Cownden [00:02:04]:
Yeah. It's it's been a roller coaster. Sometimes I have to when people ask me what I do now, I have to pinch myself to say, well, this is my next career. I've already had a career that kind of failed. But, well, maybe not failed, but I'm completely doing something else, and I'm just really lucky to be able to do what? I found something else that I love, that I'm good at.

Rob Actis [00:02:30]:
So Okay. But but you didn't fail in that. You you got a disability. You were injured. So you you didn't fail. And I don't want you ever in a 1000000 years to think you failed. You actually pivoted and shifted. What happened to you could be devastating, and you might just crawl up into a little ball and stop your life, and you didn't do that.

Rob Actis [00:02:55]:
You shifted and you pivoted. So I wanna applaud you for that. That's that's a big step. You don't think it's a big step?

Chris Cownden [00:03:02]:
Yeah. It is it is pretty big. And, I am glad that I did decide at that point that this was gonna be my last shift in the kitchen. I'm glad that I've finished off a fantastic restaurant in Melbourne, New Year's Eve. It was probably the best memories that I could have ever created. And then I just said, nope. No more for me. Let's have surgery.

Chris Cownden [00:03:24]:
Let's get myself fixed And let me try and figure out what to do next. And I'm looking back, I think it's been a couple of years now. Oh. So much has happened. I just got off a call with somebody. The next chapter is starting today.

Rob Actis [00:03:43]:
Well, you live a life of boldness, and you really are bold. And I think that's very inspiring. But I but the one thing that I will say about you, Chris, and you don't trust your power. You don't trust your strength. You're always surprised when good things happen. Why? Why why is that? You you're this great guy, and you don't trust yourself of your own power.

Chris Cownden [00:04:11]:
Yeah. That's a I deal with this every day. I don't know what it is. I definitely have low self esteem and confidence. And but why? I am not sure. It's it's probably because, this goes back to the previous episode is being bullied or and having that lost. And really, that is the root cause. I feel like that is I haven't really explored myself enough.

Chris Cownden [00:04:38]:
But when I was scammed, I lost my money. So it's every time I spend money now, I really like yeah. Lots of trauma.

Rob Actis [00:04:47]:
You you know, the one thing that I will say, you keep getting back up. You keep getting knocked down and keep getting back up. So is it possible a way to look at your life and the way that you go through life is to really truly celebrate your wins? Here's something that I did, and and and maybe it might help you, and it really helped me. When I was married and I was in a very tumultuous, marriage, my first marriage. Now I'm an incredible marriage. I'm, my god, I just can't believe how blessed I am. But I was in a very, difficult marriage and you know she didn't say nice things about me and it had an impact. Even when I left the marriage I was like wow she as I was leaving the marriage she told me you know you're just gonna end up dying alone You're not, you know, you you think you're so much and you're you're not.

Rob Actis [00:05:45]:
You're nothing. And I was like, Now that could have an impact on someone. So what I did was, you know, she had told me that I didn't have any friends and she had told me that, you know, people were just tolerating me. But then I looked at the reality of that is that I did have friends, and I did have a circle of influence, and I did have impact, and I was successful. And so, what it took me to do was to like, okay. I may not believe it, but they all believe it. So if they believe it, then that must be the reality. And my subconscious is like doing weird stuff.

Rob Actis [00:06:39]:
So eventually, I'm like, yeah, this is bullshit. It's bullshit. And the other thing is anything that happened to me in the past is the past. Like, it's the past. There's nothing you can do about the past. All you can do is live in the very present moment and for you, Chris, is you're having a great present moment and I want you to look at the wins that you're having in your life. You make connections that people would only dream about and you create opportunity that people would only dream about and that is a huge win.

Chris Cownden [00:07:19]:
Yeah. When you put it like that, I give advice to people about collecting your wins and keeping store of it. But sometimes, I don't do it myself. Yeah. There's a lot of and there's a lot of people that say that, oh, you're great at this, you're great at this. This is what your, hidden hidden talent is, is community building and

Rob Actis [00:07:42]:
Right.

Chris Cownden [00:07:43]:
Relationship building and connecting people. And then but I think everybody, everybody out there has that self doubt, but everybody else, you see the magic and the hidden talents, and you tell somebody that they're great at something, it really does help, but I don't know. I've struggled to believe everything that people tell me, because I don't believe it myself. But I guess I'm on that journey of self love and self discovery still.

Rob Actis [00:08:11]:
Yeah. So here's the way that you could possibly look at that is that you may not believe it, they believe it. So you know your past and you know that you're wounded or injured from your past. Okay? And what's today? It's 2024. Right? So today is not your past. I mean, I I think about this is that I had some crazy stuff happen in my past, like crazy stuff. The the one thing that I can tell you is I was in an armed robbery and had a 3 57 magnum put to my forehead and I didn't know if I was gonna live another couple seconds. Like, imagine if I let that trauma stop me from living the extraordinary transformational life that I'm living right now? Because it happened.

Rob Actis [00:09:16]:
It's in the past. It's not happening every single day. And what I think is happening with you is that you keep replaying over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over, but that's not what's happening. What's happening today is, dude, you're freaking rock star. You you're you're you're making connections. You're building community. You are impacting and changing lives. That's what I want you to focus on.

Chris Cownden [00:09:45]:
Yes. Yeah. This is a pivotal moment for me. It's realizing that I'm telling myself the wrong story. I holding on to the past still too much. Holding onto bad relationships or toxic people.

Rob Actis [00:10:03]:
Yeah. But here's the thing. Those bad relationships and those bad things that happened to you turned you into who you are today, the freaking badass that Chris is. So you wanna thank them. Thank you. Thank you for being such an asshole. Thank you. Thank you.

Rob Actis [00:10:24]:
Thank you for abusing me. Like all the crap and shit that happened to me in my life, I wouldn't change it for the world because it created and took like a diamond and and and and pressure and pressure and pressure and created something extraordinary.

Chris Cownden [00:10:44]:
Yeah. So powerful. And that's what I say to Ed. All the things that have happened in the past is a blessing in disguise. Yeah. A blessing in disguise.

Rob Actis [00:10:53]:
It's a blessing.

Chris Cownden [00:10:54]:
It's a blessing. And

Rob Actis [00:10:54]:
you've already and you survived it. And you're thriving.

Chris Cownden [00:10:59]:
Yeah. It's because of people like you that are very, like, in my inner circle that I I get to surround myself with you. I get to ask you advice. Probably don't ask you enough advice. I get to hang around with people that are way more influential than me and way more wise, so I think I chose I chose I chose I chose who to connect with right at the start.

Rob Actis [00:11:23]:
Right. People that are successful are not gonna hang around anybody that's not worthy of hanging around because their time is valuable, Their time is precious. And they need to really be selective of who they interact with. And it's not a snob thing or anything. It's because they're on a big mission. So without naming names, you have act access to some very influential people. People that people would would give their right arm to be around. Okay? They see something in you that you don't see.

Rob Actis [00:12:06]:
So what I'm inviting you to do is to try on that coat and know that you're pretty freaking awesome. And and go by how people respond and react to you, not by what you think of yourself.

Chris Cownden [00:12:27]:
Yep. I will take that.

Rob Actis [00:12:33]:
Like, I I you know, the reason I had you back on because I see all the stuff you're doing, and I'm thinking to myself, wow. He's doing great because I know where you were in our last podcast. Yes. And and I wanna applaud you for being vulnerable and open because, you know, people in the podcast community are gonna hear this podcast, and they're gonna go, oh, I didn't know that. They don't know that. And, also, it's gonna show them who you really are. Because podcast is act being a podcaster is probably, you know, one of the most disguised personal development courses you could ever be a part of. It's you grow.

Rob Actis [00:13:13]:
You're vulnerable. All that. You know, the conversations that I've had and the things that I've shared on this podcast have surprised and shocked me. You know, it was amazing. Last last episode I did, we were talking, and one of the things we were talking about, was abuse as a child. And I talk about how I was molested as a kid. And people have responded to me. They're like, oh my god.

Rob Actis [00:13:41]:
How did you talk about that? How did you because it's in the past.

Chris Cownden [00:13:45]:
Yeah. Like, I I I feel like I overshare a lot more on a podcast because I feel safe that I can share with somebody else. Yeah, it's different. Podcasting for me has definitely changed me in more ways than I can ever imagine. So if you listen out there, which you will be listening, start a podcast.

Rob Actis [00:14:08]:
Absolutely. And and and not only that, you know, listening to podcasts or being on podcast, but I think that when you get an opportunity to listen to podcast and all different kinds, you're gonna be a fly in the wall. Like, this is a conversation. This is the kind of conversations that you and I have all the time. We just are now recording this and sharing this. It's it's pretty cool

Chris Cownden [00:14:28]:
that way. It is really cool. And, I need to do more of them. I think this might be my first one of the year.

Rob Actis [00:14:37]:
Well, there you go. You know, and and the keyword, I think, for 2024, and I think it's really coming out as authenticity, is people just being real. Yeah. I mean, I look. I I I cried on the last podcast. I cried, and, it took a lot for me to listen to that and go. Do I really wanna cry on a podcast? And I said, yeah. Because we all have emotions, and we all go through stuff.

Rob Actis [00:15:19]:
And it was a very it wasn't a sad thing. It was a joyous thing. It was something that I've never even really shared, with anybody what happened.

Chris Cownden [00:15:31]:
It's funny you say that about crying for for out of joy. I did it yesterday. I saw a picture of my parents on on the wall, and I just took a moment to think, I'm never gonna be that young again, or never gonna experience that again. And I just spoke to my mum about it. It was we both shed a tear and it was a really special moment. And we said, we'll never in a few years time we won't spend breakfast together. So we're we're making these memories right now, and it's really special. We're just contemplating life, and it was all it was a just a really special moment.

Chris Cownden [00:16:12]:
So, yeah. Well Thanks.

Rob Actis [00:16:15]:
Life is so short and so precious. It is. The show that I did that I cried on, it's my friend Stacy, and she's starting a podcast that I'm helping her with, and it's called Suicidal Thoughts.  And, we were gonna do the podcast a while ago. It just wasn't the right time. It was too soon.

Rob Actis [00:16:52]:
And now she's going full bore. She suffers from suicidal thoughts on a regular basis. And I can tell you that there is a lot of hurt in this world. I have lost a good many friends to suicide. And it is truly horrific to have someone that you know and love, take their life.

Chris Cownden [00:17:29]:
Yeah.

Rob Actis [00:17:30]:
And it was a very deep, deep conversation, one that needs to be had. I think the podcast is gonna be extraordinary.  because the conversations are so powerful. And the way that she goes about it is a non judgmental way because she's coming from place that she's suffering. And so it's really powerful. And that's the power of podcasting is being able to have those those those conversations. And, you know, it's important to have conversations. It's important to have conversations with people that you love, and that's all part of transformation.

Rob Actis [00:18:16]:
You know, there's lots of stuff in this world and people ask me, you know, what I wanted for my birthday or for Christmas or stuff like that and I go. And you know, if if I want something I'll go get it. I really don't need anything. What I love is experiences. Like that's something that I love. My wife got me the coolest experience ever. You'll relate to this. It's with Benny Hana, and you get to be a chef for a day.

Rob Actis [00:18:46]:
It was a chef experience. And I went down there and I did my little mini training, had my friends come out and I apparently, I did such a good job at the training that they gave me the premier show table in front of the whole restaurant because of, you know, I'm kind of shy and not kind of hamming it up. And they actually wanted to hire me at Benihana to be, you know, one of the and I learned the knives and I did it so quick and it was just amazing. But that's something I talk about and I experience all the time in my head and was just super fun. I like experiences because that's what we have. I can remember that, but I guess most people what'd you get for Christmas? What'd you get for Christmas last year or the year before? Or what'd you get for your birthday? No one can remember anything they ever got. But I will tell you, when you get experiences, you remember those.

Chris Cownden [00:19:38]:
Yeah. And they're clear in your mind. Yeah. Like a rollercoast, going to a theme park or something, or having something, going to a comedy show or something. You remember the the exact jokes, and then you tell somebody and they don't get it.

Rob Actis [00:19:54]:
Yeah. Like, we went to we went to a concert the other night, and, it was a Pink Floyd, cover band. And it was called, the Black Hat Symphony. And it was so good. It was so good. Matter of fact, the guy who was the lead singer and the lead guitar, I met him and also the woman. You know the I I can't think in the Pink Floyd song, she goes, you know, all that. Okay.

Rob Actis [00:20:21]:
Unbelievable. Sent chills down my spine. So I'm actually reaching out to them, to have them on Life Transformation Radio because I would love to know the story of how they became part of this incredible group. And this, in the music industry, has a tremendous amount of respect. It's called the Black Hat Symphony, and they do Elton John and the Talking Heads and Queen, and they do Pink Floyd. And they have a 100 artists, and they pick and choose for which one. They do, like, a 100 shows a year. This one, the Pink Floyd one.

Rob Actis [00:20:58]:
It was so good. It was so what a great experience. Went with a few friends, and it was just I keep talking about it. We all keep talking about it. And, you know, if I would've if I would've just given someone a a piece of whatever, they probably wouldn't remember it, but we've been talking about it. So

Chris Cownden [00:21:17]:
Yeah. You remember those exact moments of of an experience. There's somebody in the community who's talks to musicians about their tracks, and, I'll have to put you in touch.

Rob Actis [00:21:31]:
Absolutely. I I think it's fascinating. You know, I have such respect for you musicians. The way that this guy played the guitar was incredible. It was moving. He he ended the night with Comfortably Numb. And, you know, there's that guitar solo in it. And my mind went and it was a I was so thrilled because it was a very intimate environment.

Rob Actis [00:22:01]:
It was in the Mesa Arts Performing Center Mesa Performing Arts Center, and they have symphonies there and the acoustics are incredible. The the sound engineer did such a beautiful job and his stage presence and just everything about him and we sat very close and I was watching him and the passion and the love and the intensity that he was trying to give us the most incredible experience ever. He didn't just call it in and all of those performers just like they do it every 2 nights. Like, they do it every couple nights. And they brought their a game, and you could feel it. And it was so incredible. I I loved it. If you get a chance to see the Black Hat Symphony somewhere in your town, man, go I already bought tickets for the Elton John show, but it's really incredible.

Rob Actis [00:22:59]:
They're such incredible musicians. You know, that's the sad part about the music industry. There are such incredible talents that have not made it big because they just haven't. And it's unfortunate because there are people that are probably more talented than people that are famous. And, you know, I know a few singers and they're so good and they just haven't broken through it. I'm like, how come you're not freaking a multizillionaire living in a mansion forgetting who I am? You're so good. Yeah. They don't have the connections.

Rob Actis [00:23:34]:
They don't have this.

Chris Cownden [00:23:36]:
The social media presence as well maybe. Yeah. Because a lot of people blow up and they go viral, and then all of a sudden everybody's listening to that piano song, and then they Yeah. Social media is really helping them get through. There's, we actually had a song created for my mum for Christmas, so that's like a it's a lifelong memory. But it's she can she can play it and listen to it whenever she wants, and it's been created with what I think about her and it's a really that's that's an experience in itself because she can listen to it whenever she wants. And it's not just like a chocolate box or something. Yeah.

Chris Cownden [00:24:14]:
So having that musician who might not have, like, the millions and millions, but he's being hired to write a song for people.

Rob Actis [00:24:23]:
Did you already do that? Did you already do it?

Chris Cownden [00:24:25]:
Yeah. It's it's already been written. It's called The Lucky One. You know

Rob Actis [00:24:28]:
what you should do?

Chris Cownden [00:24:30]:
Yeah. Tell me.

Rob Actis [00:24:32]:
Okay. You should sing the song and play it for her and she'll go, oh, okay. Like, see if you can drop your voice in and sing it. And she'll, like, okay, Chris. Great. And we you know, I don't know if you can sing or not, but I I the look in your face means that you're not a comfortable singer. And then and then she'll go, And then you just play the other version.

Chris Cownden [00:24:59]:
Yeah. Well, I got myself a guitar, so I do want to be able to string along, play, and maybe but we're gonna get married, you know, singer, and hopefully, she's still here and stuff.

Rob Actis [00:25:13]:
That's awesome. That's awesome.

Chris Cownden [00:25:15]:
It's

Rob Actis [00:25:15]:
Yeah. It's all about it's all about the connection. So how do you like, you have these challenges of worthiness and, you know, confidence. How do you do what you do? How do you connect with the people you connect with? How do you create what you create?

Chris Cownden [00:25:37]:
Yeah. Well, I kind of I don't forget about the the past trauma or anything, but I just don't think about it. I think about how I could help that person. I'd I'm not, like wouldn't say I connect with a 100 people a day and try and find a win win thing. It's just a natural, get to know. But the I don't know how to explain it. It just comes naturally to me. I've always been somebody that feels confident talking to strangers.

Chris Cownden [00:26:19]:
It's a secret weapon. I have a a deck of Okay.

Rob Actis [00:26:23]:
It's a secret weapon, but you but you you doubt yourself, and you don't have a lot of confidence, but you do things that would appear that you have confidence. So explain that to me. It's no I I don't understand. Because I know you and I talk to you, and then I see what you've accomplished. And I'm like, okay, so how does he do that? Yeah.

Chris Cownden [00:26:49]:
How does he do that?

Rob Actis [00:26:50]:
Because most people that don't have a lot of confidence and that don't have a lot of drive in that. How how do you do that?

Chris Cownden [00:27:04]:
Yeah. Actually, I had a bit of a moment right at the start of my podcast journey is everybody out there is accessible to me. Everybody out there wants to wants to win and wants to collaborate. So I just said, well, if that's the case, then anybody anybody I ask would want to help me or, wants to do something together. And I didn't have those that nervousness talking to them because I knew, well, it's a guarantee. It's yes. And even if it's not if it's a no, then they're not the right person right now. But I'm still gonna keep up with them, follow-up with them, and, build that relationship.

Chris Cownden [00:27:48]:
So I did I put those barriers of getting a no or getting rejected away, and I guess that gave me a lot of confidence knowing that, well, it'll be a yes someday, and, I'm sure I know somebody else for right now, but I as well, I didn't just ask to get something in return, I asked to be helpful. And I didn't I don't think I've ever sold to anybody, like, who's really close. But I've never sold to Rob. Right. I guess I guess we're selling ourselves all the time, but I definitely lowered my barriers. I think that's what definitely made me more confident when reaching out is, I know I'm gonna get a yes, or I know they're gonna help me because poor, I'm a kind person. But, maybe that's maybe that's what

Rob Actis [00:28:51]:
I know, but it it doesn't. I'm trying to understand that because it's, like, black and white or salt and pepper in one side and one side. What you just said is not what you just said. You know what I mean? Like, you're like, you know, I'm shy. I don't I don't have a lot of confidence. I I don't love self worth. And I'll approach anybody of any of any stature, of any success, and, I will reach out to them because I know they're gonna say yes.

Chris Cownden [00:29:19]:
I know. It's bizarre.

Rob Actis [00:29:21]:
That's bizarre.

Chris Cownden [00:29:22]:
I am it must be a a mask that I put on or something, but I feel like I'm very real. But I've I just had my trauma, and I'm getting over it, but I don't let that well, I don't let that affect me. But obviously, I do. It maybe that's just my personality is. I haven't explored it enough. I haven't. I need to do some more. I don't know Rob, what do I need to do?

Rob Actis [00:29:56]:
With life being so precious, so for example, if you and I have a conflict, I am all about resolving that conflict as quickly as possible and then moving forward in a positive light. And I say that because I know a lot of people, they get mad at somebody or something, and they stay mad for a day, 2 days, 5 days, 7 days, a week, 2 weeks, 3 weeks, a month. And they care about those people, but they have annihilated them from being in their life for a month. So when they pass that is 1 month that they lost out on. So in my relationships I work extremely hard to resolve the situation, admit if I'm wrong or you know not even make them wrong. Let's just figure out here it is. Okay. Great.

Rob Actis [00:31:14]:
Let's resolve it and move forward. And not it doesn't need to be a continual policy from them or me whatever resolve it and move forward. And I think that's so important because our life is so precious so if you're focusing a lot on your trauma and it's knocking you down and like people that are you know upset and they keep reliving that over and over and over and over again. They're not present in the beauty of life, and life is so precious. I will tell you, you know, someone who's had near death experiences, I'm on borrowed time. I know that and I cherish every moment that I have in this world and every moment that I get to spend with people that I love and care about and every moment that I interact with other human beings. That's important. You know when I lost my eyesight last year just a couple months ago that was so devastating.

Rob Actis [00:32:21]:
One of the things is I I was so like, wow, I'm never gonna be able to look in the eyes of people that I love and care about and and see their soul. I couldn't see, and I was so, like, man, I should, you know, connect with that person more, spent more time, this, that, and the other.

Chris Cownden [00:32:50]:
I just need to forget forget not forget like you said before, but just move on and not I think that's what this let this episode has been all about is everything's a blessing and, everything that's gone wrong up to this point has strengthened us, but it doesn't need to hold us back.

Rob Actis [00:33:15]:
Absolutely. Your past doesn't need to hold you back. My my favorite movie, I talk about every so often, The Lion King. I don't know anybody that hasn't seen The The Lion King. Have you seen The Lion King? Okay. And it's so funny. I base my life life on this now. Just one other little instance is Rafiki.

Rob Actis [00:33:38]:
When he hits him with a stick, he hits, you know, Simba, whatever, with a stick. He goes, ah, he goes, I mean, he goes, yeah. It's in the past. It it does it it it's it's in the past.

Chris Cownden [00:33:55]:
Yeah.

Rob Actis [00:33:59]:
And, you know, when we focus on trauma in our past, we're not living today.

Chris Cownden [00:34:09]:
Yeah. It's like there's so many great things that have happened today. And was I showing up fully to them? I feel like maybe I was. But, yeah, I feel like I am being pulled back by past traumas, though. I still always Yeah. Today it's oh, I haven't got that much confidence, but people are seeing that I do have confidence. So why am I telling myself that that's so I think the story needs to be different, and just work on it and reflect. Because, probably need to journal more.

Chris Cownden [00:34:45]:
I think that would be my year. 2024 is my year to just what am I what's because your thoughts are the same almost every day, and that probably just needs to change slightly or I need to be a little bit more intentional and conscious of my thoughts and action.

Rob Actis [00:35:04]:
Think about this. If it was raining outside and windy and lightning and storming, and you were standing outside in a t shirt and shorts. Right? Would you just stand out there if there was an opportunity for you to get into a house or a car? Would you?

Chris Cownden [00:35:27]:
I think I have done it before and just like, yeah. Wow.

Rob Actis [00:35:31]:
Okay. That's not what I'm talking about. Okay. We'll just say lightning and thunder and hail. Very uncomfortable, very challenging, very difficult. Wind, dangerous, right? You'd go inside.

Chris Cownden [00:35:43]:
Yep.

Rob Actis [00:35:45]:
So trauma could be you're standing outside in the rain and the storm and the hail and the the trees flying by. If you remember the movie Twister, a cow flies by. Or you can go inside. And the past is you being in the storm, and the present is you being inside. Yeah. Yeah.

Chris Cownden [00:36:13]:
It's crazy. Crazy what you can learn from other people. And then, like, I don't reframe it like that at all.

Rob Actis [00:36:21]:
And the one thing that I invite you to do is to celebrate your your wins. Do you celebrate your wins? Like, you've got great big wins all the time.

Chris Cownden [00:36:30]:
I did.

Rob Actis [00:36:30]:
You're creating. Do you celebrate? Do you stop and celebrate? Do you do whatever? Do you do you acknowledge yourself?

Chris Cownden [00:36:39]:
Probably in your inbox. I mean, today, I definitely did this. Like, yes. But if that's not really celebration, well, but but for me, I feel like it is. But it's not like, I don't go out and purposely go out and have a meal and treat myself, because that's not the way that I celebrate. But

Rob Actis [00:37:02]:
That's the way I celebrate. Give me a stink. That's what I'm talking about.

Chris Cownden [00:37:05]:
Alcohol. I don't drink alcohol. So

Rob Actis [00:37:07]:
I don't drink alcohol either, but I love I love a good meal, and I'll celebrate that way.

Chris Cownden [00:37:12]:
Yeah.

Rob Actis [00:37:13]:
But really, you know, celebrate your wins. That's so important.

Chris Cownden [00:37:17]:
Yeah. I I I celebrate in my own way just, like, in moments. Yeah.

Rob Actis [00:37:27]:
Good. Most people most people don't even do that. They just let it go right on by.

Chris Cownden [00:37:31]:
Yeah. And what I do, and I I know there's must be people who like me out there do this, take a lot of screenshots of things, that I see. Maybe not in, like, real life, but in digital life, if I see something amazing, Gavin. I'll screenshot it, and I'll save it in a Google Doc or in my email, marketing platform so that I can come back to it and share it. And I feel like there's a lot of memories that are in there that I can just reflect on and go, oh,

Rob Actis [00:38:04]:
can I

Chris Cownden [00:38:04]:
can you remember when I met Phil? Or when I met Rob? Or or when somebody said this and, those memories.

Rob Actis [00:38:12]:
Oh my god. I'm a screenshot? Yeah. I've been screenshotted?

Chris Cownden [00:38:15]:
Oh, yeah. That's amazing. May have been screenshotted. Yeah. She's she says, am I cam camera ready enough to have a phone to have a screen screenshot?

Rob Actis [00:38:31]:
Oh, my god.

Chris Cownden [00:38:33]:
Yeah. I I do like to capture moments, and maybe that a CAPTCHA wins, so I can look back on them and Facebook memories can help me or whatever it is. So, yeah. I do I do celebrate with my unique way. I celebrate with a smile on my face most of the time.

Rob Actis [00:38:54]:
That's a good thing. Like I said, objects in your mirror are not as they appear. So I just wanna congratulate you because I see your wins and I get really just, like, so excited for you to see all the things that you have done, are continuing to do, and know that you don't have the confidence and to know that you have self worth issues. That's a major, major accomplishment. So I want to applaud you, mister Chris.

Chris Cownden [00:39:23]:
Thank you. It's been a rollercoaster. But when I when I started my personal development journey, 2019, feels like a long time ago now, It was, I invested in a, like, a video marketing course and, that's when I started to network with people and learn new skills. And I think that's one of the things that I credit myself to is just continuing to learn, whether it's no code and AI or video marketing, touch typing. I feel like I picked up a lot of unique skills and met a lot of very creative and talented people, which have just helped me and encouraged me to have a lot of different mentors and coaches that I can rely on for advice and support, and some that give me really blunt advice to say you always contradict yourself, or you always put yourself down. So I'm working on that, but, yeah, that that's the key to what's happening in my life is I'm working on it and picking up the skills, yeah, and challenging myself to do different things and asking for new challenges as well. Yeah.

Rob Actis [00:40:38]:
I love it. And, Chris, you're living a life of transformation. Yes.

Chris Cownden [00:40:42]:
That is true. And it's

Rob Actis [00:40:44]:
So how how appropriate is that to be on Life Transformation Radio?

Chris Cownden [00:40:47]:
It's perfect.

Rob Actis [00:40:47]:
Thank you so much for taking time out of your day. I know it's a different what is it? In the afternoon over there? I don't even know. I

Chris Cownden [00:40:54]:
It's 7 PM.

Rob Actis [00:40:56]:
Oh, it's 7 PM. Well, thank you so much for not making me wake up in the middle of 2 in the morning to to hit your morning. But thank you so much for being here today. I applaud you. I think you're incredibly inspirational and I love that you're living a life of transformation.

Chris Cownden [00:41:11]:
Thank you so much for having me again. And bring on number 3 and number 4 and number 5.

Rob Actis [00:41:18]:
Yeah. We'll see about that. Yeah. I'll I'll be the judge

Chris Cownden [00:41:20]:
of that.

Rob Actis [00:41:21]:
We'll see about that.

Chris Cownden [00:41:22]:
You invite me back on

Rob Actis [00:41:23]:
Maybe.