Jules De Jesus Fritz Part 2
August 10, 2020
In this week's episode, Sheldon and Mariann continues to speak with Jules De Jesus Fritz on self-care, knowing when a project is right and communication with your partner.
Tip of the Week:
Support your partner as they support you.
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This episode is powered by safety from. Welcome to the safety consultant podcast.
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This is the show where I teach you the business of being a safety consultant and being an entrepreneur, and I'd like to thank you for being a listener. And this week, we are going to continue our conversation. Jewelz Desai's Fritze and is really cool.
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They really had a good time, not only with Jewelz, but my co-host Mary and my wife. That's kind of fun to have her as a co-host for a podcast. We keep thinking about doing a podcast together, and she's been making these little cameo appearances from time to time. But with Jill's nose right up our alley as a couple, because truly we are we are on a spiritual journey, but. As a couple, if you're on the journey together, it's even better.
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So Jules and her husband, Josh, they are also like that. So in this episode, we kind of talk a little bit. We continue our conversation about knowing what to make the move, to listen to your inner voice. And that comes up with entrepreneurs all the time because you are your own boss. So therefore, if a client comes to you and you're thinking and I need the money, it might be an easy job. You might be able to just do some training for them, or in some cases, you might end up doing something that you feel is going to be very simple.
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But you got that little feeling inside.
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This is this is going to be a little bit more difficult. And I don't know. I've got a sneaky, sneaky feeling that something is just not going to go right. But you decide I'm going to do this anyway. And then generally in those cases, you will find out why you have that feeling in the first place. It's awful. I've had that several times in my consulting career. And now what you would have to do is then eat crow in some cases, or you might feel like, man, I wasted time when I could have been doing something else.
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It's a learning experience. That's what it boils down to. It's a learning experience. So what I have done in the past is I made sure that I took that experience and I remembered it and I used it for something else, meaning I took that experience and I said, this time I'm going to do it differently or I'm going to vet this client differently than I even have a podcast episode. And one of my earlier episodes is about how to properly vet your clients before you actually take them on in the safety and health field.
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But when we're talking to Jules, we Miriam and I were truly trying to find out first and foremost some of the tips that she may have on when do you know that this is the right way to go and what some of the things you need to do to just give yourself the courage to take that step. And that also went on to a little bit more of her story. And then we talked about and I threw in this last question because her husband was taking care of the kids while we were doing the interview.
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So I threw in this one question truly about how do you actually work with your spouse? And if you're an entrepreneur, you need your spouse. So how do you work with your spouse just to make sure that you and your spouse together are on the same track? And how do you get those words that you need to just completely communicate with each other with no pretenses so that there's no arguments, no fussing, no fighting, none of that stuff?
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So that is what we talked about later on. So we're going to have a word from our sponsor. And then after the word from our sponsor, we're going to go get right back into the episode with Jules. Hesus Fritze, do you want to be a safety consultant?
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Listen to Dr. Jay Allen of Safety FM. Give his experience after taking the safety consultant blueprint course. I have actually done research on different consultants and looked at different consulting courses and so on. There is a pretty fancy, very expensive consulting course that is out there. I have actually purchased the consulting course, was interested. It has good information, don't get me wrong, but you have a consulting course that really drives people into focusing on safety and how to become a safety consultant.
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I will tell you on your particular course, there was better information in that particular regard than the other consulting course. There was more of a generalist form. But I figure I felt like I got more information out of yours on you giving people a direct path on what to do step by step. But I really think that you have a genuine good product where they can really assess people if they're interested in becoming a safety consultant. Register for the safety consultant blueprint i w w w dot safety consultant blueprint dot com and her code podcast for a special discount.
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Oh I, I live by the mantra and this is what I got all of my students, if it's not a yes is probably a no, it's nothing like that, you know.
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So and you know in that inside you're like. We like when you were like, Jules, you want to get on my podcast. Yes. OK, so this is this is it. And so you want to look for that because your body is here to give you signals, right?
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And so my folks that are out there who aren't necessarily spiritual, they're even on a chemical level, we can just go science, OK? There's something that gets stirred within you. So you have your instincts that start to go off. Right. So we have a fight or flight. We have all these things that we know naturally happen when our body is activated. So when you get excited and you start to feel something because sometimes your brain will feel it and that happens in a different place than where you are able to articulate it with words.
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So you have to sometimes just sit with it and see how it feels. And again, sometimes if you're having to call all your friends and say, hey, what do you think about this? That's a clue. That is not a help. If you're having to like again, talk yourself into it, step back because you need more time. And you know what? You deserve the time.
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Take it, take it. This is all about your business and your steps in your precious life. And so if you just kind of go based on what everybody else thinks, they can't hear or feel what you hear and feel. And so it's got to come from you, but you have to give yourself the room in the space to actually discern that and feel that and then know it.
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So that's that's my my advice get around a little and so forth.
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But just flip it around now and talking and thinking about what not to do something. How do you know when to have the courage to do something. So I just think it's just on a different side of the coin. So when, you know, the gut is telling you take on this client or the gut telling you you can actually leave this job and you'll be just fine if you trust. And so what's the feeling there?
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Well, that's that's a great question, because it kind of segues into the transition. So I was makeup artist and I'm doing the thing and I'm like, yeah, right. I'm loving it. But I'm like and I and I've got the celebrities and I'm doing and everybody is like, oh, my gosh, you're living the dream. You're such an inspiration.
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And I'm like, oh, I thought it was going to feel different when I got here. Is this it?
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I'm not sure. OK. And so you keep trying to figure out a way that it feels more like home to you and it feels exciting again, because again, the joy is what it's all about. And so if you're not feeling the joy connected to it, then things get realigned. And so I knew that there was something else happening. And so I had to allow myself that same advice that I just gave of just sitting with it. And I started to realize that I wanted to have a direct impact, but not only with women who wanted makeup.
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I wanted to have a direct impact on anybody who forgot who they were or didn't know that they were worth it or didn't know that they were loved as they are. And why was this so important to me? Because I started teaching. And so when I was doing these makeup classes, these women were not able to even look at themselves in the mirror because they were like they take their makeup off and now they see all the perceived flaws that they think I see.
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And now they're negative, negative, negative, like they are talking. They're such bullies to themselves. And it was heartbreaking to me. And so I was at this point in my career, I have a makeup line, so I'm teaching them and I'm trying to do my service. But it was really, I believe, for me to get a front row seat of what happens when that negative dialogue is going on on the inside and is a bully and it's attacking you and you don't even know it.
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So I even went to the length of making them do a makeup scout honor, like raise your hand and promise that you will not talk negatively about yourself and you'll be open to learn new things. I mean, I had them do the whole thing so I could set the tone of like, that's not welcome here, not on my watch.
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You are totally full here and we're going to have some fun. OK, OK. And it was hard. And so it was through that process over and over again that I was like, I want to talk to people. Like that's what I feel like I'm meant to do, is to speak to someone's heart and encourage them. Just to know that they're not, you know, it was just that simple, just that simple, and so that started to progress and that became once that bell was rung for me on realizing what it was that was kind of giving me that discontent, then the process was so loud, I can't ignore it.
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And so a lot of times what happens in our audience here may be able to identify this and relate to it. It's like, you know, what you need to do, but you feel scared to do it and you feel like I'm not sure how it's going to work out, but you get to this place where you know that it has to be better than what you're currently living or doing. And when you know that, you just get to the point where you either take a chance and follow your instincts and do something about it or something happens and it forces you into making that choice.
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But the thing is, is that that's rising up for a reason. You can only ignore it for so long before it really gets loud. It's like the check engine light in your car. Eventually, the car is going to break down and fully get your attention. So before it gets to that point, check in and say, what do you what is it? Why are you so unsettled right now?
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Why are you so restless in this?
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That that to me is is a big clue to is just knowing that that is happening to get to get your attention, to help you. Because to me it felt like as if something were guiding me, like pulling me and I just couldn't I just had to allow it to take me. And so what that did is it resulted in me selling everything. I sold everything. I'm not kidding. I was like the house gone, the furniture gone, the luxurious studio in downtown Savannah gown, all of it.
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And I was like, and I'm moving into an airstrip. That's what we're doing. And then everybody's like, what is your plan, Jules? I'm like, I don't have to follow in following this call. I don't know. We'll figure it out. I think it might involve going to some land somewhere so I can park this airstrip. I'm not sure we'll see. We'll see how it shakes out. And it's amazing because that whole two year process was incredible.
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Oh, my gosh. I would. And I learned that I'm an RV or I loved, you know, that that tiny living is like I'm living off the life for me. I loved it and it was great. And but I had I've been fighting myself on that. I wouldn't have been able to to experience that and to be on it. On a side note, my husband and I were also fighting a lot because we knew that we were both feeling this, but we didn't know how to talk about it.
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And so it was it was like, well, maybe if we just do more, I don't know why we think that. Right. Like, well, maybe if I just do more if I launched the next product or I get this other client, maybe that'll just fix it and I'll feel better. And it just doesn't it doesn't work that way.
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And so when I got to the point of me hitting all my goals, I was like, and it's still not blow my hair.
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Back then I knew I was like, I just I think this is I reached the ceiling of this particular level and I meant to now go out and do something else. And so that's when I started speaking and started writing, pushing myself to learn something new, which is tricky. And it's really tough because I make up came very naturally to me in writing. It was really hard because I wanted to write the way that I speak and it's really tough to do that.
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And so I had to allow myself space to just work that out and be patient with myself.
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So that's a big side of it to the patient, you know, just all of it. And it is so awesome just the way you were able to advocate for yourself at such a young age, you know, going back to India and just listening to that inner knowing and being able to speak up to professionals and doctors that are known for having some ego. You know, in general. Yes.
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That a lot of you know, a lot of confidence. I don't know.
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I keep coming back to that and then being able to achieve what you saw as your goal with makeup, getting to where you wanted to be and the success and then being willing to come to a point and be open to that point when that wasn't the right fit anymore.
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Not that scary, and I'm sure was scary. Made some big changes in our life, too, and, you know, it's right, but then you still step back. What am I doing? It was actually really annoying, is the feeling. It was it was less scary, more annoying.
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Like, I felt very annoyed with myself, like, why can't I just be happy with what I have?
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Why can't I just be normal and just do this thing and just be in it, be OK? And so I feel like some of the audience may feel that that angst of just being like, why can't I just have.
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Like, why do I even want to be an entrepreneur? Why can't I just have a great job working for somebody else and not be OK? And so I think that once you accept that everybody has such a journey that they're on such a path that you're feeling that stuff, don't get mad at yourself and don't get aggravated. Just stay curious and then go like, well, what is this all about? You know, I once I started that adopt that type of attitude of again, I started with my life as a surrender experiment when I decided that I came to the end of what I knew I wanted.
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But I can feel that there was more on the other side of it. I had to adopt the idea of just surrendering and going, you know what? I just sold everything. I, I have a house on wheels and I have the love of my family. I'm just going to ride out like, let's see what happens. And I just put myself in a position of just seeing what would happen and allowing that to also be a testimony to the power of that.
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I know that you don't have to be the know it all. Actually, it's better if you're not the know it all. So for me now, my process includes allowing myself to have that space to to feel it and and make decisions when new information is presented to me, meaning from my insides when I start to feel different. And I'm like, oh, that doesn't feel good anymore. Oh, this feels very exciting. It doesn't mean I'm wishy washy.
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It doesn't mean that I can't make commitments. It's about that I am following the flow of this and it's beautiful when I allow it to just flow versus trying to control it based on the small idea that I have. Because I tell you guys where I am now, I would have had no idea three years ago when I first left Savannah that I would be now sitting on a twenty five acre farm in the middle of hopeful Georgia.
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Like, come on. Hopefull like that's just for good measure. I'm like, that's just sweet, you know?
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And it's like and I and I found the space that's going to be perfect for us to host camping retreats for families and folks to come here and be with us and feel what you guys felt in our sessions Sunday, that breathing room, that's that place to just recharge and do what I'm inviting you to do, which is just sit with that, feel it, see what comes up.
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Don't be afraid of it. Just be curious by it. Now, here's the thing. It's all here to help you. It's all here to take you to that. It's good that you can't even imagine. Yeah, that's exciting. You got me thinking because we are now tiny glimmers, too. You know, as soon as I we sold our house and got the RV, my brother Marcus, you need to talk to Jules. Jules did the same thing.
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It was right around the same time, which is really funny. So so just a thought came when you said that. And I'm a no for our experience. People looked at this the same way they looked at you, you know, three heads like, what are you doing? You got a perfectly good house.
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We got nowhere to go. No, except this RV. So what what are you guys what's your plan? So that when you have a perfectly good house and you want to leave what you're like, I don't want to have no like. But why not?
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Yeah, it got to the point truly where it was like the year before I we did the math and I was actually on the road one hundred and eighty days out of the year. And so we're thinking that that was more than two hundred.
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Yeah. So we're like well why don't we just the kids when Devin graduated our son we're like let's do it so we can travel together instead of you being alone all the time and doing this by plane. So that was a choice that really made together. But along the way, though, and I do hear this is a current or a running theme of entrepreneurs, is you have to be willing to lose some people along the way, family and friends.
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Is that the same expense? You're getting as well in order for you to get to your next level, not that you have to, but sometimes there's always a confrontation or someone doesn't.
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And and the to keep that friendship would be holding you back or keep that relationship with even a family member would hold you back. And, you know, you have to go beyond that. So how do you address that? If you want to, it's up to you. That's a good question.
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How do you feel about it afterwards?
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How do you allow yourself to do it without the guilt?
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Well, the thing is, is that when you stand in your truth, no one can tell you anything different. So you have to find your truth. And this all again, I'm telling you the same instructions, the same prompts over and over again when you go inside and you see what feels right and you know what feels right. And that becomes your truth. And you're like, it's right for me to make this move. And I feel it.
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It's a hell, yes. It feels like a right thing.
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I get excited when I think about it and that's it. And you make that decision if that's your truth. The thing is, is that you don't have to defend it because there's nothing to defend. You don't have to explain it unless you want to. These are obligations that we have put on ourselves. If someone doesn't get it, they don't get it right. But you have to understand that it's not your job to convince them of what you're doing is you'll waste a lot of energy.
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And so when you feel good about what you're doing, you're happy in what you're doing. Nobody can tell you differently when you know if you allow them to and you allow them. But this is why research and polling people say, what do you think? What do you think it's getting out of that habit? And it's like so I turn within and I check in in my house first in my heart and I feel what feels right. And then I'll go to my partner.
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And then what is your inner heart telling you? And a lot of times, so when we know it's true, we're on the same page, a line when it's not the same page.
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We know that we've got to do some more digging. But that's really that's he's my partner. That's why I'm even like checking in with him. I'm like, all right, this is what I'm feeling. Here's where we are.
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Right. And I don't even say that.
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That's where you have to put all your eggs in that basket. I mean, it's really I'm I want you as an individual to learn how to trust in yourself. And that way it doesn't matter if your mom tells you I don't get it, it's OK because she doesn't have to because you're the one living your life day in, day out, doing the work. And you have to feel good about it so you can carry your heart is sometimes people just don't get it because of where they are in their life.
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And that's what I learned. It's I was making people very uncomfortable because they were then forced to think about the things that they were complacent with in their lives. It actually had nothing to do with me. They were projecting their own feelings onto me by saying, look, how are you? Because they are asking themselves why. I really love what you're saying, but I don't know how that would work out. So I'm going to ask you a million questions and try to blow holes in what you're doing and blow your confidence out water.
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So that way it'll make you feel better. And I saw that pretty quickly. I was like, I just got I don't know. You have to stay tuned. I don't know.
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Say, I don't know. But it wasn't just us. You guys, I reserve the right to hold it close is what I'm saying.
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So if if I feel the need to share, then I share. But I think a lot of times we overshare because we're trying to gain sometimes approval. There is people pleasing that's involved in that. But then it's also you're not really trusting yourself because you're like, does it sound good to you? Does it sound right? And the thing is, is you're asking people for directions, the places that they don't know where you're going so they can give you those answers.
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So some and sometimes, again, people just can't hang with it. And it's because it's too much of of the light Ameera shine back at them of the things that they need to take a look at in their own hearts and in their own lives and their own businesses. And they may not be ready to do that. And you may represent that to them. And so if that happens, then you know that it's just you know, it's just the way that it goes.
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You know, unfortunately, there are cycles, you know, a season, a reason and a lifetime is what a lot of times we'll come back to. But mainly just knowing that I'm the one on this journey every single day. I'm the one that I have to deal with every single day. And so I've that are make me proud.
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I'd better figure out how to hang on to my joy and not abandon it, including making other people feel comfortable. I know you're about to get a live house with everybody right now. Can I ask you one more thing before we let you go? Yeah. How did you and Josh gain the words of vocabulary to get to where you're at amenorrhea? And we've been together for over twenty four years, so it's something that we've just developed throughout our years.
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But it seems like the vocabulary, the understanding, the trust, the love, the passion, because you're doing this together now, the the new evolution of what you guys are doing is together as a couple. So what were some of the things that you would say? Because the reason I ask is any entrepreneur, especially if you have two entrepreneurs in the family, you and the partner, you may be on different tracks and sometimes you may be at different tracks at different times.
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And so therefore, it becomes really hard to develop those words that needs to be said so that you not only can grow even separately, but still together as a couple. But then you're running your house together. You're deciding, you know, like us, we decided to be flexitarian because we're not we're not up to the legal level yet. So we're like a little bit on the pescatore inside. And then I flex more than she does on the meat side.
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But that's really that's a decision that we've been making together as a couple. And I've noticed with you and Josh, you've got the vocabulary together or you allow each other to give some sort of vocabulary that you understand together. And I just wanted to know my long, my long winded way of qualifying. This question is, how do you get your partner on board with your business and keep going together? Oh, that's good.
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And it's the thing is, is when you're you brought a really great point about when there's two entrepreneurs in the situation or maybe you don't work together on the same common goal. For me, it always comes back to that individual level, like I've got to be good with what I'm doing within myself. And that's what I learned, because in the beginning we didn't understand what I was doing when we first met. He was a senior in college and I came to Savannah again because I thought I was going to die and I'm going to be doing makeup.
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And he's like, don't women know how to do their makeup? Like, I don't understand. And talking about up and you're going to charge them what? But he's like you're never, ever like he was just so confused by me. And it wasn't that he was being ugly. It's just that he had never really been around someone like me. Right. So it didn't make me wrong. Didn't make him wrong. Just what it was. And so over time, me continuing to be true to myself and being true to myself and having that confidence within me that I actually didn't know what I was doing, because I truly believe that each one of us, we do know what we're doing when we had trust, when we allow ourselves to trust.
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Do you have the answers inside of us? Right. I believe that with everything. And and so when he started to see these examples over and over again of me doing this, then he started to realize like, oh, well, there's something to this. And then he watched it. Right. But there was a strong point where after we had gotten married, where spiritually I was going through a pretty strong awakening. So this is like after Jolene was born and like, man, goodness, nothing like a child coming in the world to induce a spiritual awakening.
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I know I'm a get a man for some people.
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Right. OK, so I was definitely like, whoa, this this idea of who I am has been very small compared to what's really in me. And my awakening came through the form of a book called The Untethered Soul with Michael Singer.
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And so this book was like just blew me away and I needed him to understand. So I didn't have the language yet and I was just discovering the stuff about myself. So I, I said, I need you to read this book. I need you to read this book and I'll be real honest with you all. I said I need you to read this book so we can stay together because you are very unaware of things that I need you to be aware of.
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And I need to be able to talk to you about the stuff that's happening within me. But I can't explain it to you. So just read this book. And so that is what really opened the door up for the communication in the language to start. And then it was like and then he was like, whoa.
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And then it was but again, back to that's when flames were. There to push each other to the point where we are truly meant to be and sometimes we won't do it for ourselves. Sometimes it takes a child coming into the world.
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Sometimes it takes a spouse saying, I need you to dig a little deeper with me. And that's an example of what happened for us. And so and it's been a constant evolving and just knowing above all, that we genuinely love each other. We know we got married for a reason because we love each other. And so I have to make a choice if this is either in my acting in love or am I calling for love. So if I'm acting in love and I'm giving love, that's one thing.
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But if I'm getting ugly and we're fighting whatever that means, something's going on with me and I need to check in there. And so taking that personal responsibility has been very helpful for us individually so we can stay as a solid unit. I think when you keep expecting the other person to do it for you or to fill that gap for you, then you're not going to be able to, you know, to to reach where you're really meant to reach.
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So that's why with our session Sunday, having that gap plan of how you can really help each other but also start with yourself is crucial. And I think that gasline that we talked about is crucial in your work life to applying there of what am I what do I need? Where's my battery level right now? What do I need to get me there? And if I turn the tables on myself and I'm not a caregiver and I'm taking care of me, then everything else is bonus.
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Everything else that comes in is bonus. So if he then does something really nice for me or really supportive, that's bonus because I already gave it to me first. And so then it becomes instead of a burden, it becomes a gift. It's not I'm not putting that on him. Like, you have to do this. You have to support me. You have to believe in what I believe I believe in. So I'm working on that being enough, you know.
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So that's my that's my long winded answer. I set you up for that one. Does that good?
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Did that help you? Because I know you guys doing it together is like and can be a you know, it definitely pushes things, you know, it's supposed to be triggering. So you know what you and you know what to strengthen.
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I just kept thinking kind of going back when you were talking about how people react to work and friends and family and then leading up to your relationship, your marriage, but evolving. And we're all evolving at a different pace and being respectful of that. And you're right. I mean, I I came across that, too. When I left 16 years of teaching, I had teachers looking at me like, what is wrong with you? And you're going to do what you're going to to teach those.
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How are you going to do this? I mean, and it's very, very close friends that did not understand and that that fear on me that a lot of that or their fear on me and a lot of that, I think came from them not really being happy with what was going on in the world with education, but then respecting that and evolving within your relationship.
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You know, it came with us a little differently with like a community that we met in South Florida. And our daughter actually was the first one to kind of get involved in this. And then I got interested in it and then started doing some classes with this community and started developing this language and this spiritual understanding. And then I remember the first one, I went through a kind of the shell that and I'm like, I need you to do this so that we can do it, so that we can communicate.
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And I mean, even though we wouldn't be evolving in the same speed. But just so that he could understand what I was going through. And then once he did, a lot of doors opened up for us and were willing to explore more, you know, spiritually and then have, I think, even better communication and conversations together. When we started meditating together in the mornings, especially when I left my job first before she did, I would wake up in the morning.
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We would meditate for like a half hour or so and then 20 minutes then. So she'll get ready and then she'll go to work. And then my day was great and truly that community health is really started thinking about spirituality is part of that four legged stool. We talked about the just mentioned, you know, where you need the body and spirit and the physical and emotional and truly, when we had the vocabulary that says, yes, this is something that's going to help my business.
[00:35:56.360]
This is a way for me to check in to say I'm not feeling good right now. I need something. So let me just be silent for a few minutes or listen and kind of help us together to the cup.
[00:36:11.210]
And then a week later, I think also it's you get comfortable with speaking your needs. And so there's what I found is like there's usually one person in the relationship who's more comfortable speaking their needs and kind of has to set the example for the other one. And so a lot of times, like most of the time, women are OK with saying, I need this or I need that. And so it's almost, again, like having that example for the other person to know, like it's safe to say what you need and it's not going to be rejected.
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It's going to be accepted as your truth. And I will honor that and say you almost make that commitment with each other. And there's also recognizing when it's not the right time to do that stuff like you have to be in a good space where like those four parts being filled up and your and your number being way up there for you to be able to receive that information and know that it's coming in love. You know, there's times where I will want to have a conversation with Josh or him to have a conversation with me.
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And we're just not in a place where we can bring our best to that and give the grace that's necessary. And there is a big part of it is recognizing that and going, hey, let me I know I'm feeling kind of low right now. So let me let me circle back when I when I can give you more.
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And so and just being honest, I think a lot of times we try to do too much and pretend that we can do more than we can do. And there's no shame.
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There's no there's nothing wrong with saying I'm just wiped out right now and I love you so much. I want to be able to give you more grace. And I want to be able to listen to you without getting upset about something that is just silliness. And so as far as our language, I think it's just kind of evolved over years of just learning what felt like the truth in the moment and not ego, because sometimes your your ego pattern will just trip off.
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And that's a whole nother.
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Well, I want to thank you so much. It's been awesome and truly just a wonderful guest and a new friend.
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Funny because, you know, again, new old great new friends that I like that. So please help us understand how to get you how to reach you. If you noticed any website, resorts or any retreats you're doing right now, Mike will give us give us the rundown. All right.
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The main thing I really I you know, I text I'm a texter, so I like that. I like to. And the reason I like text is because I don't really like email. And that feels like work to me. That doesn't with text like boom, boom, boom, like easy in and out, you know, I can send you a quick blessing while I hear your request or said you if I need something to make you smile. And so my tech my number is that your pen?
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Because I really want to do this. So two two nine two zero six nine to eight zero. And so one more time.
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That number is also on my website, but it's two two nine two zero six nine to eight zero. And that's comes direct to me. I'll text you back. And my website is w w w dot.
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Jules j u l e s loves OBSS dot me. And the reason why that's the name is because I want it every time that you put that into your in your computer or your phone to just get that little reminder.
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It was like a little wink of an affirmation that I'm throwing at you. So on that side, I've got we have a podcast. So however you consume podcast, we're there. I have lots of storytelling. I have lessons that I'm teaching so, so much so much content there on our website is also the blog. And the main thing that we just started, which is really exciting, is we have a membership. So we've we're growing a membership community.
[00:40:33.620]
And so this is where we have our breathing room sessions. The breathing room is an experience of just coming together and allowing yourself to just be so Josh in our holding space and we're giving practical tools and tips and just stories on how to make it through the current times on a day to day. Faces like step this step, a lot of times everything just feels so overwhelmed that you can't even navigate through the moment. And so that's what our our desire is to just have a space.
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You come as you are and we just share what's working for us and encourage you just to keep keep moving on.
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So that, again, is all on our get involved page on our website. So I would love to have you guys be members and hang out with me there.
[00:41:24.590]
And then if you have any questions, text me if you want to send in the picture.
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That's all. I just want to be your friend does it all.
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Thank you so much. Awesome. Thank you guys for having me here. Take care. Bye bye.
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Welcome back to the podcast. And I like to thank everyone for listening. I like to think Jules and Josh for being a part of the podcast. Josh was taking care of the other half of the family over there at the Fritze home, I would imagine is probably the way you would say it. So, Josh, thank you for sharing deals with us. And we had a really good time. So I want to thank Jules for coming to the podcast.
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And I just wanted to thank everybody for listening and being podcast subscribers that are for those of you that aren't subscribers. So please go ahead and subscribe to my podcast and any of the stations that you're listening to me on. That's awesome. To have and leave a review if you can be so nice for me. So I know how this is helping you and helping your life. I know I don't always talk about specifically safety consulting, but what I do like to talk about is entrepreneurship and all the facets of that.
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And you got to think of all facets of entrepreneurship as being body, soul, spirit, and then you really need to think about your spouse as well. And that's what's going to lead me to the tip of the week, including your spouse. And I'm so grateful that I had Marianne as my co-host. And truly, if you are an entrepreneur, especially if you and your spouse are both entrepreneurs, there comes a time where you get caught up with all the things that are opportunities for you.
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You have opportunities falling at the sky all the time for entrepreneurship. So I have learned to listen to my wife, whoever your partner is, I would say the tip of the week is going ahead and listening to your partner, because whoever that partner is in your life, you guys are bonded together for a reason. You've come together for a reason. I don't know what it is you do. So therefore, I would say cherish that. You know, it's it's one of those things that you you only get that soulmate one time, you know, that that's soulmate to me when it comes up.
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You got to cherish that relationship and hold on to it. So as a tip of the week, I'm going to say do whatever you can to nourish that relationship. So when the times when you get more and more busy, those busy moments now, then you're also going to be probably strained a little in the relationship. So you and your partner will have to take a little extra time when you get through it, just to kind of come back and regroup and make sure that you have a date night if possible.
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That's the one to watch the kids and do a nice little date night. If you're caregiving, have someone come by and take over care, giving duties if possible, and then you have a date night. But sometimes you might have to just make it, you know, when the kids are asleep or the care person you're giving care to is asleep. And now it's going to be deep moment.
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However that works out in your situation. I don't know. But I do truly want to make sure that that I spend this little moment just to tell you, value your partner, value your time with your partner, and then reward your partner for all the hard work that they've done to support you. And then if you're both entrepreneurs, I know it goes both ways where you get supported and then you do the supporting. And that's something that's special. It's special out there.
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So typically we value your partners, do something special, and it's actually going to encourage your business. It's going to help your business and they'll help you in your ARCHIM. Entrepreneurial journey. All right. So I'm so glad, again, that you guys have been able to be here with me in this episode, get on this episode has been powered by safety from.
This episode is powered by safety from. Welcome to the safety consultant podcast.
[00:00:08.530]
This is the show where I teach you the business of being a safety consultant and being an entrepreneur, and I'd like to thank you for being a listener. And this week, we are going to continue our conversation. Jewelz Desai's Fritze and is really cool.
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They really had a good time, not only with Jewelz, but my co-host Mary and my wife. That's kind of fun to have her as a co-host for a podcast. We keep thinking about doing a podcast together, and she's been making these little cameo appearances from time to time. But with Jill's nose right up our alley as a couple, because truly we are we are on a spiritual journey, but. As a couple, if you're on the journey together, it's even better.
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So Jules and her husband, Josh, they are also like that. So in this episode, we kind of talk a little bit. We continue our conversation about knowing what to make the move, to listen to your inner voice. And that comes up with entrepreneurs all the time because you are your own boss. So therefore, if a client comes to you and you're thinking and I need the money, it might be an easy job. You might be able to just do some training for them, or in some cases, you might end up doing something that you feel is going to be very simple.
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But you got that little feeling inside.
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This is this is going to be a little bit more difficult. And I don't know. I've got a sneaky, sneaky feeling that something is just not going to go right. But you decide I'm going to do this anyway. And then generally in those cases, you will find out why you have that feeling in the first place. It's awful. I've had that several times in my consulting career. And now what you would have to do is then eat crow in some cases, or you might feel like, man, I wasted time when I could have been doing something else.
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It's a learning experience. That's what it boils down to. It's a learning experience. So what I have done in the past is I made sure that I took that experience and I remembered it and I used it for something else, meaning I took that experience and I said, this time I'm going to do it differently or I'm going to vet this client differently than I even have a podcast episode. And one of my earlier episodes is about how to properly vet your clients before you actually take them on in the safety and health field.
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But when we're talking to Jules, we Miriam and I were truly trying to find out first and foremost some of the tips that she may have on when do you know that this is the right way to go and what some of the things you need to do to just give yourself the courage to take that step. And that also went on to a little bit more of her story. And then we talked about and I threw in this last question because her husband was taking care of the kids while we were doing the interview.
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So I threw in this one question truly about how do you actually work with your spouse? And if you're an entrepreneur, you need your spouse. So how do you work with your spouse just to make sure that you and your spouse together are on the same track? And how do you get those words that you need to just completely communicate with each other with no pretenses so that there's no arguments, no fussing, no fighting, none of that stuff?
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So that is what we talked about later on. So we're going to have a word from our sponsor. And then after the word from our sponsor, we're going to go get right back into the episode with Jules. Hesus Fritze, do you want to be a safety consultant?
[00:04:21.590]
Listen to Dr. Jay Allen of Safety FM. Give his experience after taking the safety consultant blueprint course. I have actually done research on different consultants and looked at different consulting courses and so on. There is a pretty fancy, very expensive consulting course that is out there. I have actually purchased the consulting course, was interested. It has good information, don't get me wrong, but you have a consulting course that really drives people into focusing on safety and how to become a safety consultant.
[00:04:51.800]
I will tell you on your particular course, there was better information in that particular regard than the other consulting course. There was more of a generalist form. But I figure I felt like I got more information out of yours on you giving people a direct path on what to do step by step. But I really think that you have a genuine good product where they can really assess people if they're interested in becoming a safety consultant. Register for the safety consultant blueprint i w w w dot safety consultant blueprint dot com and her code podcast for a special discount.
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Oh I, I live by the mantra and this is what I got all of my students, if it's not a yes is probably a no, it's nothing like that, you know.
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So and you know in that inside you're like. We like when you were like, Jules, you want to get on my podcast. Yes. OK, so this is this is it. And so you want to look for that because your body is here to give you signals, right?
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And so my folks that are out there who aren't necessarily spiritual, they're even on a chemical level, we can just go science, OK? There's something that gets stirred within you. So you have your instincts that start to go off. Right. So we have a fight or flight. We have all these things that we know naturally happen when our body is activated. So when you get excited and you start to feel something because sometimes your brain will feel it and that happens in a different place than where you are able to articulate it with words.
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So you have to sometimes just sit with it and see how it feels. And again, sometimes if you're having to call all your friends and say, hey, what do you think about this? That's a clue. That is not a help. If you're having to like again, talk yourself into it, step back because you need more time. And you know what? You deserve the time.
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Take it, take it. This is all about your business and your steps in your precious life. And so if you just kind of go based on what everybody else thinks, they can't hear or feel what you hear and feel. And so it's got to come from you, but you have to give yourself the room in the space to actually discern that and feel that and then know it.
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So that's that's my my advice get around a little and so forth.
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But just flip it around now and talking and thinking about what not to do something. How do you know when to have the courage to do something. So I just think it's just on a different side of the coin. So when, you know, the gut is telling you take on this client or the gut telling you you can actually leave this job and you'll be just fine if you trust. And so what's the feeling there?
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Well, that's that's a great question, because it kind of segues into the transition. So I was makeup artist and I'm doing the thing and I'm like, yeah, right. I'm loving it. But I'm like and I and I've got the celebrities and I'm doing and everybody is like, oh, my gosh, you're living the dream. You're such an inspiration.
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And I'm like, oh, I thought it was going to feel different when I got here. Is this it?
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I'm not sure. OK. And so you keep trying to figure out a way that it feels more like home to you and it feels exciting again, because again, the joy is what it's all about. And so if you're not feeling the joy connected to it, then things get realigned. And so I knew that there was something else happening. And so I had to allow myself that same advice that I just gave of just sitting with it. And I started to realize that I wanted to have a direct impact, but not only with women who wanted makeup.
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I wanted to have a direct impact on anybody who forgot who they were or didn't know that they were worth it or didn't know that they were loved as they are. And why was this so important to me? Because I started teaching. And so when I was doing these makeup classes, these women were not able to even look at themselves in the mirror because they were like they take their makeup off and now they see all the perceived flaws that they think I see.
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And now they're negative, negative, negative, like they are talking. They're such bullies to themselves. And it was heartbreaking to me. And so I was at this point in my career, I have a makeup line, so I'm teaching them and I'm trying to do my service. But it was really, I believe, for me to get a front row seat of what happens when that negative dialogue is going on on the inside and is a bully and it's attacking you and you don't even know it.
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So I even went to the length of making them do a makeup scout honor, like raise your hand and promise that you will not talk negatively about yourself and you'll be open to learn new things. I mean, I had them do the whole thing so I could set the tone of like, that's not welcome here, not on my watch.
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You are totally full here and we're going to have some fun. OK, OK. And it was hard. And so it was through that process over and over again that I was like, I want to talk to people. Like that's what I feel like I'm meant to do, is to speak to someone's heart and encourage them. Just to know that they're not, you know, it was just that simple, just that simple, and so that started to progress and that became once that bell was rung for me on realizing what it was that was kind of giving me that discontent, then the process was so loud, I can't ignore it.
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And so a lot of times what happens in our audience here may be able to identify this and relate to it. It's like, you know, what you need to do, but you feel scared to do it and you feel like I'm not sure how it's going to work out, but you get to this place where you know that it has to be better than what you're currently living or doing. And when you know that, you just get to the point where you either take a chance and follow your instincts and do something about it or something happens and it forces you into making that choice.
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But the thing is, is that that's rising up for a reason. You can only ignore it for so long before it really gets loud. It's like the check engine light in your car. Eventually, the car is going to break down and fully get your attention. So before it gets to that point, check in and say, what do you what is it? Why are you so unsettled right now?
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Why are you so restless in this?
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That that to me is is a big clue to is just knowing that that is happening to get to get your attention, to help you. Because to me it felt like as if something were guiding me, like pulling me and I just couldn't I just had to allow it to take me. And so what that did is it resulted in me selling everything. I sold everything. I'm not kidding. I was like the house gone, the furniture gone, the luxurious studio in downtown Savannah gown, all of it.
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And I was like, and I'm moving into an airstrip. That's what we're doing. And then everybody's like, what is your plan, Jules? I'm like, I don't have to follow in following this call. I don't know. We'll figure it out. I think it might involve going to some land somewhere so I can park this airstrip. I'm not sure we'll see. We'll see how it shakes out. And it's amazing because that whole two year process was incredible.
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Oh, my gosh. I would. And I learned that I'm an RV or I loved, you know, that that tiny living is like I'm living off the life for me. I loved it and it was great. And but I had I've been fighting myself on that. I wouldn't have been able to to experience that and to be on it. On a side note, my husband and I were also fighting a lot because we knew that we were both feeling this, but we didn't know how to talk about it.
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And so it was it was like, well, maybe if we just do more, I don't know why we think that. Right. Like, well, maybe if I just do more if I launched the next product or I get this other client, maybe that'll just fix it and I'll feel better. And it just doesn't it doesn't work that way.
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And so when I got to the point of me hitting all my goals, I was like, and it's still not blow my hair.
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Back then I knew I was like, I just I think this is I reached the ceiling of this particular level and I meant to now go out and do something else. And so that's when I started speaking and started writing, pushing myself to learn something new, which is tricky. And it's really tough because I make up came very naturally to me in writing. It was really hard because I wanted to write the way that I speak and it's really tough to do that.
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And so I had to allow myself space to just work that out and be patient with myself.
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So that's a big side of it to the patient, you know, just all of it. And it is so awesome just the way you were able to advocate for yourself at such a young age, you know, going back to India and just listening to that inner knowing and being able to speak up to professionals and doctors that are known for having some ego. You know, in general. Yes.
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That a lot of you know, a lot of confidence. I don't know.
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I keep coming back to that and then being able to achieve what you saw as your goal with makeup, getting to where you wanted to be and the success and then being willing to come to a point and be open to that point when that wasn't the right fit anymore.
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Not that scary, and I'm sure was scary. Made some big changes in our life, too, and, you know, it's right, but then you still step back. What am I doing? It was actually really annoying, is the feeling. It was it was less scary, more annoying.
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Like, I felt very annoyed with myself, like, why can't I just be happy with what I have?
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Why can't I just be normal and just do this thing and just be in it, be OK? And so I feel like some of the audience may feel that that angst of just being like, why can't I just have.
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Like, why do I even want to be an entrepreneur? Why can't I just have a great job working for somebody else and not be OK? And so I think that once you accept that everybody has such a journey that they're on such a path that you're feeling that stuff, don't get mad at yourself and don't get aggravated. Just stay curious and then go like, well, what is this all about? You know, I once I started that adopt that type of attitude of again, I started with my life as a surrender experiment when I decided that I came to the end of what I knew I wanted.
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But I can feel that there was more on the other side of it. I had to adopt the idea of just surrendering and going, you know what? I just sold everything. I, I have a house on wheels and I have the love of my family. I'm just going to ride out like, let's see what happens. And I just put myself in a position of just seeing what would happen and allowing that to also be a testimony to the power of that.
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I know that you don't have to be the know it all. Actually, it's better if you're not the know it all. So for me now, my process includes allowing myself to have that space to to feel it and and make decisions when new information is presented to me, meaning from my insides when I start to feel different. And I'm like, oh, that doesn't feel good anymore. Oh, this feels very exciting. It doesn't mean I'm wishy washy.
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It doesn't mean that I can't make commitments. It's about that I am following the flow of this and it's beautiful when I allow it to just flow versus trying to control it based on the small idea that I have. Because I tell you guys where I am now, I would have had no idea three years ago when I first left Savannah that I would be now sitting on a twenty five acre farm in the middle of hopeful Georgia.
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Like, come on. Hopefull like that's just for good measure. I'm like, that's just sweet, you know?
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And it's like and I and I found the space that's going to be perfect for us to host camping retreats for families and folks to come here and be with us and feel what you guys felt in our sessions Sunday, that breathing room, that's that place to just recharge and do what I'm inviting you to do, which is just sit with that, feel it, see what comes up.
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Don't be afraid of it. Just be curious by it. Now, here's the thing. It's all here to help you. It's all here to take you to that. It's good that you can't even imagine. Yeah, that's exciting. You got me thinking because we are now tiny glimmers, too. You know, as soon as I we sold our house and got the RV, my brother Marcus, you need to talk to Jules. Jules did the same thing.
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It was right around the same time, which is really funny. So so just a thought came when you said that. And I'm a no for our experience. People looked at this the same way they looked at you, you know, three heads like, what are you doing? You got a perfectly good house.
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We got nowhere to go. No, except this RV. So what what are you guys what's your plan? So that when you have a perfectly good house and you want to leave what you're like, I don't want to have no like. But why not?
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Yeah, it got to the point truly where it was like the year before I we did the math and I was actually on the road one hundred and eighty days out of the year. And so we're thinking that that was more than two hundred.
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Yeah. So we're like well why don't we just the kids when Devin graduated our son we're like let's do it so we can travel together instead of you being alone all the time and doing this by plane. So that was a choice that really made together. But along the way, though, and I do hear this is a current or a running theme of entrepreneurs, is you have to be willing to lose some people along the way, family and friends.
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Is that the same expense? You're getting as well in order for you to get to your next level, not that you have to, but sometimes there's always a confrontation or someone doesn't.
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And and the to keep that friendship would be holding you back or keep that relationship with even a family member would hold you back. And, you know, you have to go beyond that. So how do you address that? If you want to, it's up to you. That's a good question.
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How do you feel about it afterwards?
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How do you allow yourself to do it without the guilt?
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Well, the thing is, is that when you stand in your truth, no one can tell you anything different. So you have to find your truth. And this all again, I'm telling you the same instructions, the same prompts over and over again when you go inside and you see what feels right and you know what feels right. And that becomes your truth. And you're like, it's right for me to make this move. And I feel it.
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It's a hell, yes. It feels like a right thing.
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I get excited when I think about it and that's it. And you make that decision if that's your truth. The thing is, is that you don't have to defend it because there's nothing to defend. You don't have to explain it unless you want to. These are obligations that we have put on ourselves. If someone doesn't get it, they don't get it right. But you have to understand that it's not your job to convince them of what you're doing is you'll waste a lot of energy.
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And so when you feel good about what you're doing, you're happy in what you're doing. Nobody can tell you differently when you know if you allow them to and you allow them. But this is why research and polling people say, what do you think? What do you think it's getting out of that habit? And it's like so I turn within and I check in in my house first in my heart and I feel what feels right. And then I'll go to my partner.
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And then what is your inner heart telling you? And a lot of times, so when we know it's true, we're on the same page, a line when it's not the same page.
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We know that we've got to do some more digging. But that's really that's he's my partner. That's why I'm even like checking in with him. I'm like, all right, this is what I'm feeling. Here's where we are.
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Right. And I don't even say that.
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That's where you have to put all your eggs in that basket. I mean, it's really I'm I want you as an individual to learn how to trust in yourself. And that way it doesn't matter if your mom tells you I don't get it, it's OK because she doesn't have to because you're the one living your life day in, day out, doing the work. And you have to feel good about it so you can carry your heart is sometimes people just don't get it because of where they are in their life.
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And that's what I learned. It's I was making people very uncomfortable because they were then forced to think about the things that they were complacent with in their lives. It actually had nothing to do with me. They were projecting their own feelings onto me by saying, look, how are you? Because they are asking themselves why. I really love what you're saying, but I don't know how that would work out. So I'm going to ask you a million questions and try to blow holes in what you're doing and blow your confidence out water.
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So that way it'll make you feel better. And I saw that pretty quickly. I was like, I just got I don't know. You have to stay tuned. I don't know.
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Say, I don't know. But it wasn't just us. You guys, I reserve the right to hold it close is what I'm saying.
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So if if I feel the need to share, then I share. But I think a lot of times we overshare because we're trying to gain sometimes approval. There is people pleasing that's involved in that. But then it's also you're not really trusting yourself because you're like, does it sound good to you? Does it sound right? And the thing is, is you're asking people for directions, the places that they don't know where you're going so they can give you those answers.
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So some and sometimes, again, people just can't hang with it. And it's because it's too much of of the light Ameera shine back at them of the things that they need to take a look at in their own hearts and in their own lives and their own businesses. And they may not be ready to do that. And you may represent that to them. And so if that happens, then you know that it's just you know, it's just the way that it goes.
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You know, unfortunately, there are cycles, you know, a season, a reason and a lifetime is what a lot of times we'll come back to. But mainly just knowing that I'm the one on this journey every single day. I'm the one that I have to deal with every single day. And so I've that are make me proud.
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I'd better figure out how to hang on to my joy and not abandon it, including making other people feel comfortable. I know you're about to get a live house with everybody right now. Can I ask you one more thing before we let you go? Yeah. How did you and Josh gain the words of vocabulary to get to where you're at amenorrhea? And we've been together for over twenty four years, so it's something that we've just developed throughout our years.
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But it seems like the vocabulary, the understanding, the trust, the love, the passion, because you're doing this together now, the the new evolution of what you guys are doing is together as a couple. So what were some of the things that you would say? Because the reason I ask is any entrepreneur, especially if you have two entrepreneurs in the family, you and the partner, you may be on different tracks and sometimes you may be at different tracks at different times.
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And so therefore, it becomes really hard to develop those words that needs to be said so that you not only can grow even separately, but still together as a couple. But then you're running your house together. You're deciding, you know, like us, we decided to be flexitarian because we're not we're not up to the legal level yet. So we're like a little bit on the pescatore inside. And then I flex more than she does on the meat side.
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But that's really that's a decision that we've been making together as a couple. And I've noticed with you and Josh, you've got the vocabulary together or you allow each other to give some sort of vocabulary that you understand together. And I just wanted to know my long, my long winded way of qualifying. This question is, how do you get your partner on board with your business and keep going together? Oh, that's good.
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And it's the thing is, is when you're you brought a really great point about when there's two entrepreneurs in the situation or maybe you don't work together on the same common goal. For me, it always comes back to that individual level, like I've got to be good with what I'm doing within myself. And that's what I learned, because in the beginning we didn't understand what I was doing when we first met. He was a senior in college and I came to Savannah again because I thought I was going to die and I'm going to be doing makeup.
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And he's like, don't women know how to do their makeup? Like, I don't understand. And talking about up and you're going to charge them what? But he's like you're never, ever like he was just so confused by me. And it wasn't that he was being ugly. It's just that he had never really been around someone like me. Right. So it didn't make me wrong. Didn't make him wrong. Just what it was. And so over time, me continuing to be true to myself and being true to myself and having that confidence within me that I actually didn't know what I was doing, because I truly believe that each one of us, we do know what we're doing when we had trust, when we allow ourselves to trust.
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Do you have the answers inside of us? Right. I believe that with everything. And and so when he started to see these examples over and over again of me doing this, then he started to realize like, oh, well, there's something to this. And then he watched it. Right. But there was a strong point where after we had gotten married, where spiritually I was going through a pretty strong awakening. So this is like after Jolene was born and like, man, goodness, nothing like a child coming in the world to induce a spiritual awakening.
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I know I'm a get a man for some people.
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Right. OK, so I was definitely like, whoa, this this idea of who I am has been very small compared to what's really in me. And my awakening came through the form of a book called The Untethered Soul with Michael Singer.
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And so this book was like just blew me away and I needed him to understand. So I didn't have the language yet and I was just discovering the stuff about myself. So I, I said, I need you to read this book. I need you to read this book and I'll be real honest with you all. I said I need you to read this book so we can stay together because you are very unaware of things that I need you to be aware of.
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And I need to be able to talk to you about the stuff that's happening within me. But I can't explain it to you. So just read this book. And so that is what really opened the door up for the communication in the language to start. And then it was like and then he was like, whoa.
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And then it was but again, back to that's when flames were. There to push each other to the point where we are truly meant to be and sometimes we won't do it for ourselves. Sometimes it takes a child coming into the world.
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Sometimes it takes a spouse saying, I need you to dig a little deeper with me. And that's an example of what happened for us. And so and it's been a constant evolving and just knowing above all, that we genuinely love each other. We know we got married for a reason because we love each other. And so I have to make a choice if this is either in my acting in love or am I calling for love. So if I'm acting in love and I'm giving love, that's one thing.
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But if I'm getting ugly and we're fighting whatever that means, something's going on with me and I need to check in there. And so taking that personal responsibility has been very helpful for us individually so we can stay as a solid unit. I think when you keep expecting the other person to do it for you or to fill that gap for you, then you're not going to be able to, you know, to to reach where you're really meant to reach.
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So that's why with our session Sunday, having that gap plan of how you can really help each other but also start with yourself is crucial. And I think that gasline that we talked about is crucial in your work life to applying there of what am I what do I need? Where's my battery level right now? What do I need to get me there? And if I turn the tables on myself and I'm not a caregiver and I'm taking care of me, then everything else is bonus.
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Everything else that comes in is bonus. So if he then does something really nice for me or really supportive, that's bonus because I already gave it to me first. And so then it becomes instead of a burden, it becomes a gift. It's not I'm not putting that on him. Like, you have to do this. You have to support me. You have to believe in what I believe I believe in. So I'm working on that being enough, you know.
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So that's my that's my long winded answer. I set you up for that one. Does that good?
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Did that help you? Because I know you guys doing it together is like and can be a you know, it definitely pushes things, you know, it's supposed to be triggering. So you know what you and you know what to strengthen.
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I just kept thinking kind of going back when you were talking about how people react to work and friends and family and then leading up to your relationship, your marriage, but evolving. And we're all evolving at a different pace and being respectful of that. And you're right. I mean, I I came across that, too. When I left 16 years of teaching, I had teachers looking at me like, what is wrong with you? And you're going to do what you're going to to teach those.
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How are you going to do this? I mean, and it's very, very close friends that did not understand and that that fear on me that a lot of that or their fear on me and a lot of that, I think came from them not really being happy with what was going on in the world with education, but then respecting that and evolving within your relationship.
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You know, it came with us a little differently with like a community that we met in South Florida. And our daughter actually was the first one to kind of get involved in this. And then I got interested in it and then started doing some classes with this community and started developing this language and this spiritual understanding. And then I remember the first one, I went through a kind of the shell that and I'm like, I need you to do this so that we can do it, so that we can communicate.
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And I mean, even though we wouldn't be evolving in the same speed. But just so that he could understand what I was going through. And then once he did, a lot of doors opened up for us and were willing to explore more, you know, spiritually and then have, I think, even better communication and conversations together. When we started meditating together in the mornings, especially when I left my job first before she did, I would wake up in the morning.
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We would meditate for like a half hour or so and then 20 minutes then. So she'll get ready and then she'll go to work. And then my day was great and truly that community health is really started thinking about spirituality is part of that four legged stool. We talked about the just mentioned, you know, where you need the body and spirit and the physical and emotional and truly, when we had the vocabulary that says, yes, this is something that's going to help my business.
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This is a way for me to check in to say I'm not feeling good right now. I need something. So let me just be silent for a few minutes or listen and kind of help us together to the cup.
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And then a week later, I think also it's you get comfortable with speaking your needs. And so there's what I found is like there's usually one person in the relationship who's more comfortable speaking their needs and kind of has to set the example for the other one. And so a lot of times, like most of the time, women are OK with saying, I need this or I need that. And so it's almost, again, like having that example for the other person to know, like it's safe to say what you need and it's not going to be rejected.
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It's going to be accepted as your truth. And I will honor that and say you almost make that commitment with each other. And there's also recognizing when it's not the right time to do that stuff like you have to be in a good space where like those four parts being filled up and your and your number being way up there for you to be able to receive that information and know that it's coming in love. You know, there's times where I will want to have a conversation with Josh or him to have a conversation with me.
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And we're just not in a place where we can bring our best to that and give the grace that's necessary. And there is a big part of it is recognizing that and going, hey, let me I know I'm feeling kind of low right now. So let me let me circle back when I when I can give you more.
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And so and just being honest, I think a lot of times we try to do too much and pretend that we can do more than we can do. And there's no shame.
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There's no there's nothing wrong with saying I'm just wiped out right now and I love you so much. I want to be able to give you more grace. And I want to be able to listen to you without getting upset about something that is just silliness. And so as far as our language, I think it's just kind of evolved over years of just learning what felt like the truth in the moment and not ego, because sometimes your your ego pattern will just trip off.
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And that's a whole nother.
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Well, I want to thank you so much. It's been awesome and truly just a wonderful guest and a new friend.
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Funny because, you know, again, new old great new friends that I like that. So please help us understand how to get you how to reach you. If you noticed any website, resorts or any retreats you're doing right now, Mike will give us give us the rundown. All right.
[00:38:53.540]
The main thing I really I you know, I text I'm a texter, so I like that. I like to. And the reason I like text is because I don't really like email. And that feels like work to me. That doesn't with text like boom, boom, boom, like easy in and out, you know, I can send you a quick blessing while I hear your request or said you if I need something to make you smile. And so my tech my number is that your pen?
[00:39:20.570]
Because I really want to do this. So two two nine two zero six nine to eight zero. And so one more time.
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That number is also on my website, but it's two two nine two zero six nine to eight zero. And that's comes direct to me. I'll text you back. And my website is w w w dot.
[00:39:48.020]
Jules j u l e s loves OBSS dot me. And the reason why that's the name is because I want it every time that you put that into your in your computer or your phone to just get that little reminder.
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It was like a little wink of an affirmation that I'm throwing at you. So on that side, I've got we have a podcast. So however you consume podcast, we're there. I have lots of storytelling. I have lessons that I'm teaching so, so much so much content there on our website is also the blog. And the main thing that we just started, which is really exciting, is we have a membership. So we've we're growing a membership community.
[00:40:33.620]
And so this is where we have our breathing room sessions. The breathing room is an experience of just coming together and allowing yourself to just be so Josh in our holding space and we're giving practical tools and tips and just stories on how to make it through the current times on a day to day. Faces like step this step, a lot of times everything just feels so overwhelmed that you can't even navigate through the moment. And so that's what our our desire is to just have a space.
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You come as you are and we just share what's working for us and encourage you just to keep keep moving on.
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So that, again, is all on our get involved page on our website. So I would love to have you guys be members and hang out with me there.
[00:41:24.590]
And then if you have any questions, text me if you want to send in the picture.
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That's all. I just want to be your friend does it all.
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Thank you so much. Awesome. Thank you guys for having me here. Take care. Bye bye.
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Welcome back to the podcast. And I like to thank everyone for listening. I like to think Jules and Josh for being a part of the podcast. Josh was taking care of the other half of the family over there at the Fritze home, I would imagine is probably the way you would say it. So, Josh, thank you for sharing deals with us. And we had a really good time. So I want to thank Jules for coming to the podcast.
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And I just wanted to thank everybody for listening and being podcast subscribers that are for those of you that aren't subscribers. So please go ahead and subscribe to my podcast and any of the stations that you're listening to me on. That's awesome. To have and leave a review if you can be so nice for me. So I know how this is helping you and helping your life. I know I don't always talk about specifically safety consulting, but what I do like to talk about is entrepreneurship and all the facets of that.
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And you got to think of all facets of entrepreneurship as being body, soul, spirit, and then you really need to think about your spouse as well. And that's what's going to lead me to the tip of the week, including your spouse. And I'm so grateful that I had Marianne as my co-host. And truly, if you are an entrepreneur, especially if you and your spouse are both entrepreneurs, there comes a time where you get caught up with all the things that are opportunities for you.
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You have opportunities falling at the sky all the time for entrepreneurship. So I have learned to listen to my wife, whoever your partner is, I would say the tip of the week is going ahead and listening to your partner, because whoever that partner is in your life, you guys are bonded together for a reason. You've come together for a reason. I don't know what it is you do. So therefore, I would say cherish that. You know, it's it's one of those things that you you only get that soulmate one time, you know, that that's soulmate to me when it comes up.
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You got to cherish that relationship and hold on to it. So as a tip of the week, I'm going to say do whatever you can to nourish that relationship. So when the times when you get more and more busy, those busy moments now, then you're also going to be probably strained a little in the relationship. So you and your partner will have to take a little extra time when you get through it, just to kind of come back and regroup and make sure that you have a date night if possible.
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That's the one to watch the kids and do a nice little date night. If you're caregiving, have someone come by and take over care, giving duties if possible, and then you have a date night. But sometimes you might have to just make it, you know, when the kids are asleep or the care person you're giving care to is asleep. And now it's going to be deep moment.
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However that works out in your situation. I don't know. But I do truly want to make sure that that I spend this little moment just to tell you, value your partner, value your time with your partner, and then reward your partner for all the hard work that they've done to support you. And then if you're both entrepreneurs, I know it goes both ways where you get supported and then you do the supporting. And that's something that's special. It's special out there.
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So typically we value your partners, do something special, and it's actually going to encourage your business. It's going to help your business and they'll help you in your ARCHIM. Entrepreneurial journey. All right. So I'm so glad, again, that you guys have been able to be here with me in this episode, get on this episode has been powered by safety from.
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