Dating Kinky
You're asking the wrong question!
April 27, 2022
I prefer not to answer questions like this because the answer doesn't help you.
I run a local (to the RDU/Triangle area in NC) discord server and event that are designed to help kinky people meet others in the community. 

In that server, we have a channel dedicated to asking anonymous questions about dating, love, sex, and kink. And last week, one of those questions inspired this writing. 

The question was: 

> "Is it possible to have a healthy & fulfilling relationship with a narcissist?"

Someone responded and said, that some narcissists are diagnosed and actively work to be better people. 

Another responded and pointed out that many people throw around the term narcissism to represent a cluster of behaviors that all humans cycle through in their lives, and so of course it's possible. 

Me, I prefer not to answer questions like this as they are stated, because to me, the answer doesn't help you. 


It's the wrong question. 

As someone had already answered, yes, it is possible to have a healthy relationship with an actual narcissist. 

Is it probable? No. 

And does that answer help them with the specific person in question? 

Not at all. 

Because the answer to whether it's possible to have a healthy relationship with, well, anyone is "yes," but it's not probable, because healthy relationships are complex, and it takes both people having an elusive combination of qualities including desire, relationship skills and compatibility with you. 


As is often the case, this post is LONG for IG. Find the full blog post and podcast through the link in our profile. *smiles* 

Find the full transcript for this episode here.