In today's Mindset Monday episode, she draws the curtains open to what 'the gap' is and how it impacts our individual journeys. As a phenomenal success and inspiration to anyone hoping to achieve their own personal goals in life and in business, she gives us a deep dive on how you can fill in this 'gap' in your property investing path, while also highlighting a practical way of avoiding burnout and the benefits of keeping a journal.

Timestamps:
01:20 | Defining 'the Gap'
04:42 | Avoiding Burnout
08:53 | Close Your Eyes… and See It Again
13:54 | The Joys of Keeping a Journal
17:11 | The Time to Start is Now
22:24 | Filling in the Gap
25:39 | Use It or Lose It
28:59  | Southies, Easties, Westies

Resources and Links:

[00:01:53] Don't keep on setting the expectations of 'This is going to happen', 'This is going to happen'. Yes, set goals. But we can move the goalposts. But always reflect back on the achievement fruits we've actually chalked up personally. It gives us the ability to be open with ourself. It gives us the ability to be also looking at how we could do things differently. 

This is Property Investory where we talk to successful property investors to find out more about their stories, mindset and strategies.

 

I’m Tyrone Shum and in this episode of Mindset Monday, we’re chatting with the phenomenal life and property coach Jill McIntyre. Holding nothing back, she draws the curtains open to what 'the gap' is and how it impacts our individual journeys. She also shares and highlights a practical way of avoiding burnout and the benefits of keeping a journal.

Tyrone Shum:   

Throughout the successes and the achievements she's attained in her career, McIntyre very much acknowledges the reality of 'the gap' between one milestone reached and the next project or goal to aim for. Knowing the impact it has on anyone's journey, she succinctly defines 'the gap'—starting with a key question.

Jill McIntyre:   

[00:00:35] So how often do we get to the end of a deal, and we look at the money we've made or what's happened during that journey? But we don't go back and actually measure our growth during that period. We look at the end, and we're continually working on our expectations for what's going to happen when we are on completion. 

[00:01:00] But to me, we've got it back to front; we shouldn't be doing that. We should be measuring our achievements and our growth all the way through. 

[00:01:10] You and I have just had conversations prior to coming on. And I brought to mind how much have you grown in the last six months, for say, example, Tyron, with what you're doing. It isn't till we go back and we reflect that. And I do this so often with clients. 

[00:01:30]You know, say you've been with me seven weeks— 'What have you, and how have you grown and developed different ideas and your own self-confidence in that seven weeks since we started coaching?', for example. We need to bring that same sort of thinking into the expectations versus our achievements. 

[00:01:53] Don't keep on setting the expectations of 'This is going to happen', 'This is going to happen'. Yes, set goals. But we can move the goalposts. But always reflect back on the achievement fruits we've actually chalked up personally. It gives us the ability to be open with ourself. It gives us the ability to be also looking at how we could do things differently. 

[00:02:19] Because we as we all know, deals don't always stack up the way we want them to stack up along the way from start to finish. 

[00:02:28] Yeah. 

Jill McIntyre: 

[00:02:28] So sitting on each step of a development is an achievement in itself. We've got to reflect on what our growth in that period was, rather than continually racing ahead of the end-amount and what's going to happen. 

[00:02:46] If you work on your achievements that you've done, you will also enjoy the journey. And how important is it that each of us enjoy a journey of property with passion that you can't wait to get out and into it on a daily basis? You won't have that same passion if you work on your expectations, then your milestone. But you will enjoy the journey more if you work on the growth within you. 

[00:03:18] And the growth within pay, you're wiping your horizons, with building a team around you and good support team, and getting out and marketing your deal or whatever your strengths are. 

[00:03:31] So look on your individual growth to bring in and to measure where you are, who you are. And that will support you moving forward.

Tyrone Shum:  

[00:03:42] And I think this is really key to understand. Because the fact is, is that, as you said, a lot of us look at it from the point of view [of] 'Okay, how much are we going to make at the end of this deal? How much profit is it going to return? What can we do with all that money that we're going to make?' Etcetera, etcetera. 

[00:03:57] And that could be you know, many, many years down the track. Sometimes, it might not even happen that soon, because the expectations that we set, as you know, with any property development, there are always going to be, you know, risks and delays and so forth like that never goes through smoothly. 

[00:04:10] I guarantee you, if your mindset says, 'Okay, I'm going to go through this property development journey, and everything's going to run smooth-sailing', forget it; that's not gonna happen. So, as you said, setting up milestones to achieve [at] each different level—whether it be you know, once you get your DA approved, you do a celebration; once you start to get the construction, again, another celebration, etc., etc. That would be, you know, things that we're going to actually appreciate in the achievements that you've gotten along the way. 

[00:04:34] Otherwise, you get through the whole, you know, three or four years or whatever that timeframe that you've done in the development and you reached the end to celebrate, you'd probably be burnt out way before then. And I can tell you from experience, that's what it felt like for me for many, many months.

[00:04:48] Burnout is the the optimum thing. And we've just been talking prior to recording, and I suggested to Tyrone about making sure you set in your calendar every year about having different breaks off. Because where we think that we're, you know, bigger than the mountain around us, but we're not.

[00:05:10] We've got to have time out to recharge. We've got to have time out for our balance within our life, with family, with friends. It's not always 'work, work, work', because all we're doing is working ourself into the ground. We might have the money to do it, but we want to enjoy the journey as well—and equally so. 

[00:05:31] And we've just been talking about that, I think, part a hold that moment, when you do have time off. And you hold that moment when you come back. And first day at work, you're overwhelmed with so many appointments so much on and you're very, very quickly in back into them, Tyrone. Would you agree with me?

[00:05:51] I totally agree, Jill. And this is, you know, for the audience and listeners out there: I've been away, you know, for the last few weeks travelling through Australia, meeting not only clients and stuff like that, but I've also been travelling through to be able to see different things that I haven't been able to see.

[00:06:05] You know, for example, one of it was down at Melbourne, where I drove down to the Great Ocean Road. And obviously, for me, there was one particular point I need to be at, because I've got investments down there. But along the way, just enjoy the journey. 

[00:06:17] Because it was a long drive, I thought I'd take a nice two-day trip down the Great Ocean Road while I'll go down there and enjoy that journey to see like the 'Twelve Apostles', to actually see all the different bushes and go for bush walks in the beautiful waterfalls, in the forest, and so forth.

[00:06:32] And that was amazing, because it allowed me to be able to enjoy that journey, rather than go, 'Okay, [I'm] just gonna get down to that one spot, and then drive those three [or] four hours without taking a break'. So that I think was allowing me to be able to take my time and enjoy the journey rather than just rush, rush, rush and get there. 

[00:06:48] And then same thing, you know, going down to another location down in South Australia, I was able to go through to Barossa Valley and go on hot air balloon. And I was just telling Jill, that recently, you know, when I went there, which is only a few days ago, the feeling of actually hopping into that hot air balloon and going up across the Murray River was such a peaceful, calm, and such [an] enjoyable 'wow' moment that I have not experienced for a long time, you know, besides having my kids—that was probably a 'wow' moment as well for me too. 

[00:07:19] But I think this was a tranquil and quiet moment that you could just go up in the balloon and just gradually rise up there and enjoy that moment to see the beauty of what we have on our planet. And I'll say, you know, once I did that, I really enjoyed it. 

[00:07:32] But the next day afterwards, I came back. And I was pretty much swamped, you know, arriving back home and Sydney; swamped with so much work back-to-back meetings and interviews and stuff like that. And I went, I kind of feel sad, because I missed that moment already. But Jill gave me a different perspective. And I might as well let Jill, you know, to share that with you on how I should approach it differently instead.

[00:07:53] Yes, it's interesting, because I suggested, Tyrone, that you close your eyes, and you're just stepping in, you were the last of all of the 16 people, to hop into that balloon. And so you had a bird's eye view of all of the spectacular sights over there, the river—the Murray River—and wherever you were. How did it feel? What was the calmness that came upon you? That there was no wind; it was just such a beautiful time that you were feeling in the space you needed to be. 

[00:08:31] And the more that we went and did that, the more you could feel exactly how it was. And then I just said, 'If you could do that in 15 or 20 seconds, how many times a day?' 

[00:08:45] And every time you come back and you just feel that overwhelming feeling, just close your eyes. That's it— 15 to 20 seconds, and you will bring in that feeling of what it was like to feel peace and calm. 

[00:09:04] The more you do this, the quicker that feeling will come back into you. And you can have little mini trips all day and it's the best trip you'll ever have. And you'll still get through your work because you brought also your whole body down and thinking, rather than being on overload and pushed. So it's helping you health-wise to achieve a lot more in your day by doing it. 

[00:09:31] The joy and control of this, that it's so easy for us to lose the moment and think 'Gee, it was terrific. Wish I was there now', where in actual fact, the more that you can bring in the feelings of what it was like, what it was like having time out not having to rush along the Great Ocean Road. What did it feel like going at your own pace? And this is something that you haven't, don't normally do. 

[00:10:01] And so to bring in the feelings, you must connect your feelings. And for people who aren't feely-touchy people, start to be working on your feelings. If you're very analytical, you're not connected closely to feelings. But how did you feel when you did, you know, whatever it is you're doing? Were you excited?  

[00:10:22] And you've got to just highlight the points of what brought it home for you, Tyrone. 'I felt calm and peaceful' —and you can bring that in. 

[00:10:35] I'm a great follower of Andy Shaw, and his work. It's S-H-A-W. And he's an English guy. And on mindset and its magic— and he calls it the '15-second gap', where you you've got to hold a positive thought for 15 seconds. Well, just keep on doing that this is a positive thought. 

[00:10:55] But you're lucky because your positive thought is something that really is very, very, very central. It could go back for five years— marriage, you know, could be the birth of your child. For some people, it could be all different experiences that have happened. How did you feel? That it's your feelings that will bring up the positive emotions that will connect to the practice makes [unintelligible].

[00:11:21] Yeah, it makes me think that what I need to do is I need to write down all the positive experiences that I've achieved and had, whether it be, you know, in my life or in the last few months or so forth, and then basically attach the moment in my head to that positive experience. 

[00:11:39] I personally find that if I have music in the background, somehow I've attached that feeling to that music or that tone. And as soon as I turn on this specific track, or whatever it is, it brings that memory back very quickly. Or, as you said, closing my eyes, I can do that. 

[00:11:53] But I think for me, like because I [do] like getting out in the bush and go bush walking and long walks in the forest. And I love waterfalls and stuff like that. All I need to do is just breathe in that fresh air, which, very fortunate, I live very close to a bush. And I think that will trigger the memory very quickly for me anyway. 

[00:11:56] And then I guess this is the thing, it's not just only for me, but for anyone else listening out there that it's definitely possible. It's just a matter of having that trigger to bring back that positive memory. And I think for me, because it's so recent, it's easy for me to do that now. 

[00:12:25] But I'm thinking, while we're going through a tough time, especially six months ago, when I was going through some challenges and stuff like that, I really, really needed to have those kinds of almost meditation-type of positive reinforcements to help me get out of some of the challenges that I was facing. Because mentally it was very, very hard and I felt burnt out. 

[00:12:41] Hence the reason why Jill knows why I've taken a lot of time off recently just to be able to have that kind of time to refresh. And I think it's better not only for me mentally and [my] well-being, but also better for business, better for my clients, better for everyone else.

Jill McIntyre: 

[00:12:55] Well, the other thing that I've done for many years is have a journal and write. And this might be pretty mundane for some people who don't share their feelings on paper or whatever. And I consider what I've got, I've had visitors just a for five days and the close friends, and I shared my journal with them. A lot of it's personal stuff. 

[00:13:19] But over the last five days of having them, we've done winery for lunch; we've done day trips; we've been to special places for [unintelligible] and lots of love, laughter and light times. I would have over the next few days, I'll put down some of those special memories in my journal. 

[00:13:39] I can open the journal at any point and go back to a special place. That also is another way of bringing in my 15 seconds.

[00:13:49] My journal is... I consider it [as] my legacy for both of my children down the track. My journal is full of anything, everything, my intentions, my goals. If I get a very special birthday card from a kid [or] something, it's in there. If I read an article that's positive, it's in there. 

[00:14:10] So I can go back to any point, just open up a new page. It doesn't mean that when I'm going through troubled times that I don't write [it] too. But I also, I suppose [due to] learnt behaviour, I'm able to bring in... Yes, there's difficulties happening now— which happens for all of us, by the way. It isn't just you or me. It happens for all of us. But then what do I have to do to change that outcome? Or how can I move past that outcome? All of that's in my journal. 

[00:14:46] It's a journal of my achievements, as I was mentioning earlier, rather than my expectations. And it's measuring those that takes me to a place that I love. And I can either get any page to go there, that'll be different. But it's also showing me of what I've grown. But it will be when I'm not here, my children will be able to learn a lot of daily lessons from those too, which is a legacy for me. 

Coming up after the break, McIntyre emphasises the motivatingly personal aspect of keeping a journal…

[00:19:18] You can't make any mistakes. This isn't a quiz. This isn't something that, you know, who cares? It's your journal. It's what you're doing.

Her practical tips on what you can do to positively fill in 'the gap'…

[00:24:41] Don't forget to reward and give back to yourself. And this is where your 15-second gap is—rewarding yourself, coming back to recharge yourself. 

She shares a great reminder on why it's key to really enjoy all the moments—big or small.

[00:27:20] And, you know, if you don't use it, you lose it.

And that’s next. I’m Tyrone Shum and you’re listening to Property Investory.

While many people find it understandably difficult to start or maintain consistency in keeping a journal, McIntyre graciously sheds more light on her personal habit of journaling. She not only unpacks what's inside her journal; she also shares tips on overcoming the lure of procrastination and the trap of perfectionism in this venture.

[00:15:54] I don't do it on a daily basis these days. I used to do a lot more when I was troubled. If I'm going, I'm a great believer that if you've stuck for some reason or another, there will be...you've got to identify what's really sticking you.

[00:16:14] Say, for example, you might have had a very troublesome childhood. And if you need to write a letter to your parents, to your mother or your father, or whoever it is, you've got to be very specific. I don't... And there's a lot of hurt, anger, frustration [that] comes out there. Various sorts of writings, I would do in a spiral exercise book, where I can tear it out at the end when I go through the process and burn it. 

[00:16:41] My journal is specifically of growth things. My planning of Mind Maps goes in there when I'm having a twice a year, say, for example, when you're even doing your planning of your holidays each year and timeouts recharge time. You need to be putting those in your journal; do it in your Mind Map form. And yes, I can't draw but who cares? At from Jill McIntyre are all these balloons that are filled with growth ideas.

[00:17:13] I also too, because I've had two clients over the last month that have started on [a] journey of journaling. Both of them are well and truly into property and have been doing it for years. And it's just been an enormous 'A-ha!' —especially for one of them that's gone in and further along than the second one. It's been such an 'a-ha' of even going down and getting some photos printed off as works and putting them in his journal of special occasions. 

[00:17:47] And did you take photos while you were away? Why don't you stick them in your journal of the hot air balloon or things that you've done? Because straightaway, you can say that it's in your journal. But I also find that a lot of people procrastinate over what journal to get. I like a big A4 one because I, you know, do articles and cards and things in them. 

Tyrone Shum: 

[00:18:38] Alright, so let's talk a little bit about the journaling side of things. And I think you're explaining to me, Jill, that the way you're approaching it is that you get a journal and, you know, put memories in there, photos and so forth. It doesn't have to be anything, you know, too hard. Just make it simple, so that you can get started.

[00:18:58] That's right. But I also find that with the perfectionist amongst us, that they procrastinate after over buying a journal, what to buy. When they do get it, they look at the journal because they don't want to mess up the first three pages. So they just keep on looking at the journal and don't use it. 

[00:19:18] You can't make any mistakes. This isn't a quiz. This isn't something that, you know, who cares? It's your journal. It's what you're doing. Just arm yourself with different coloured pens and now go for it. And the rest just evolved. 

[00:19:31] And it is part of your growth. It's part of my growth of who I am. But it's also... [it] grounds me on— Am I on track? What am I doing? Because it's a good way of [going], 'Yes, well, this is where I was; this is who I am now'. 

[00:19:50] But I also do a lot of mind-mapping. So twice a year, when I'm looking at projections from the business, from the personal life, with what I'm doing And I've got me in the middle, and then just balloons coming off it. And each of those balloons is part of the growth. 

[00:20:17] So each of those balloons is growth. Then I work on... 

[00:20:21] Out of my journaling, of the growth that I've got in there, I would then go and work on, what do I need to do to step up to achieve that growth over the next six months or 12 months? Who do I need to bring into my life? What timelines can I bring in? What do I have to do on a monthly basis with those timelines? And it really helps me with my daily planning and monthly planning. 

[00:20:48] But all of that is in the journal. All of my outings that are special to me or special memories are in there. 

[00:20:56] So you can go back to your 15 seconds of special time just by opening your journal. And it's there; it's not something that I have to do. It's something that I really enjoy doing. And I might save up a few articles out of the paper or something. And yes, having an hour or so every now and again to do it. Then I might write three days in a row, because there's a lot happening of progress stuff that's coming. 

[00:21:24] But it's about growth, the journal is you; it's growth.

[00:21:28] And this kind of fills in the gap then, as we've been talking about, because it actually allows you to be able to write down all the achievements of, you know, what it is. Because the gap is, is that you want to enjoy the journey along the way rather than just having...

[00:21:43] Oh, absolutely. Yes, spending in my part, for my part, my children are grown up and got children and these sorts of things. They're aware of so much of what I do; but they're not aware of lots of what I do with clients and special memories and things like that, and my grandchildren. 

[00:22:03] And I would visualise that these journals that I've got. And they live by the bed or by my desk where I am on a daily basis. Never go too far from home without them. And my children, there'll be lots of life lessons in them—in the journal—that I'm sure will help them.

[00:22:23] I'm curious to know what... I mean, you don't have to share in too much detail. But what's an example of something recently that you remembered that was really powerful that has helped you achieve some of your goals? And just, you know, just for sort of an example for listeners out there, because...just to show people how simple it is to do.

[00:22:43] So something that I've achieved my goals? Well, it was funny at Christmas time, I was doing—and you and I have previously talked about this, about getting a new car.

[00:22:54] Yes. 

[00:22:54] And I'm not into cars, and I've had [the] same car for ages. And at Christmas time when I was working on projecting the goals of what I was wanting to do for the next 12 months, it was time to get a new car. It was time to reward myself for what I've done, and to come back at that level. 

[00:23:14] And yes, so I think it was on the 30th of December [2022]. I said to my daughter, 'I'm going to buy a new car today'. They came—the children. 

[00:23:25] Wonderful. 

[00:23:31] You're pretty much able to put that inside and journal about that and share that moment.

[00:23:36] Absolutely. And three months later, it arrived—ordered and arrived, yes.

[00:23:44] How did that make you feel?

[00:23:48] It was pretty good when Adam, once again, got photos of it. And I know that you sent me photos when you got your new car. It was part of the sharing of the joy. But it was also the rewards of what I've achieved over the last number of years came in that car. And to have it to go away with my visitors and go out for days and long day trips. It was just beautiful to have it. 

[00:24:14] I'm not good on gadgets. And we often laugh about that—certainly the children do. And one of my visitors, he sat in the front seat and he's a high Northey and very much into gadgets. He was in his element driving the bendy gun back for the waves for Sunday and out to the wineries on Saturday. He could run all the good gadgets that he liked to do, that it was just such a joy to be driving and rewarding yourself. 

[00:24:41] Don't forget to reward and give back to yourself. And this is where your 15-second gap is—rewarding yourself, coming back to recharge yourself. So it's part of the joy. That's the journey we're on.

[00:24:55] That's right. Yeah, it makes me think, because there's so many snippets of my journey in the last few weeks. I've been through the travels. And I can already picture them already mentally in my head. Like, for example, I think a lot of people know how much of a sustainable/electric freak I am. I'm moving across the sustainable energy, you know; that's the reason why I also changed my cars—because I went electric. 

[00:25:20] And something I've been saying to all my staff —and I haven't really said this publicly—was I've always wanted to drive a Tesla, no matter what it is. It could be a Model 3, a Model Y or whatever—just to drive and experience what's like. And I finally fulfilled that dream of wanting to drive one when I was actually down driving, because I hired one out for a good two weeks as well. And yeah, it just got very addictive to actually keep driving it. 

[00:25:42] It is a very full-gadget type of driven car—very, very minimalistic. But everything is all technology-based. And the experience, I remember very clearly, it was the amount of power and acceleration this car can have, because I've never driven a car that fast before. 

[00:25:59] And for listeners out there who might know speed, you can get up to zero to 100 kilometres an hour in about like 3.5 seconds or something. And that acceleration is phenomenally fast. So for me, it was just a pleasure to drive. And, you know, furthermore, to have that autopilot function to go down to the Great Ocean Road was just so, so good. 

[00:26:18] Because, I think people who know me, I can't, I'm not very much of a very long drive. I can't sit in the car for too long; I end up falling asleep after about an hour driving. So I take lots of breaks. And hence, you know, Jill, knowing me, is that taking it easy was actually very helpful to go down there because I could take many breaks. 

[00:26:35] But with the Tesla having the autopilot, I literally switched it 'on' to autopilot—not saying that it drove me all the way from point A to point B automatically. But I could actually enjoy the views outside when I was driving down rather than constantly just focus on one straight lane. 

[00:26:49] So things like that helped with the technology. But it also helped with me being calm, to be able to just enjoy that moment as well, because there's a long journey for many, many hours for me to drive down to the place I had to go to.

[00:26:59] So that's brought up something else as well, Tyrone. How often do we live through some really important times, like you've just shared with us, but we don't really enjoy them, or we don't even take them on the very instantaneous and we lose them? 

[00:27:20] And, you know, if you don't use it, you lose it. And so this is for something, journalists by my reporting it, but to bring your feelings in and go back to your feelings is so, so important to recharge yourself. And it's necessary; it's a vital part of existence that we need to do.

[00:27:43] And I totally agree with you on that side of things; it's just so important. And for anyone out there, you know, if you're thinking that you've been working, working, working and not having time off, it's highly recommended that [you] take some time off, because it really helps to rejuvenate those batteries. 

[00:27:57] It's kind of sometimes contradictory, because you think that if you want to get something done, you're just going to [need to] keep going through it. But by allowing the brain to rest, your body to relax, you actually come back in a calmer state to think things clearly. 

[00:28:08] And I've learned that just from the last few few months, I've actually just [been] working hard, hard, hard, and it doesn't help. You actually need to take breaks to be able to enjoy.

[00:28:18] So how much of this fits in? Because, some of the people who will be listening to this podcast will be very much North personalities—very entrepreneurial in their thinking and very much 'I got every new gadget that opens and charts'. So that'd be thinking, 'Oh, fancy buying a new car and putting it in your journal then', because it would be automatic for them. But they're only a small number of the population—only about 10% to 15% of the population. 

[00:28:47] You know, South people and back-end people and Westies—and I'm an Eastie—and things like that along the way, we don't buy things as readily. We don't reward ourselves as much as an entrepreneurial type, forward-thinking person would. So we're talking to the mass of the population here, not to the small handful of people who were the other way around. Yep.

[00:29:11] Yeah, absolutely. Well, for maybe another topic, we'll have to explain what North Westies, and Southies, as well too for the people—as they're different personalities.

[00:29:19] They're part of our profiling, and it becomes part of our life. And it's just an exciting way of identifying who you are, your strengths, your weaknesses. But also, it gives us a greater understanding too, Tyrone, of what our partners are like and what our bosses are like and who we need in a joint venture partner. So it's an important part of what fills my day and what fuels my clients. 

[00:29:47] This is just a language that we all use. So I apologise if I've been talking in that language today.

[00:29:56] Let's make it an episode for the next time.

Jill McIntyre: 

[00:29:59] I think that's a date.

Thank you to Jill McIntyre, our guest on this special episode of Property Investory.