What is up everybody, it is a another mentor Monday. I'm Michele Heyward. I'm so happy you have joined me here for mentor Monday, what is up. So it is end of summer, but it is still absolutely great time of year. I'm always excited to get on here and have dialogue with you about mentor Monday. So I want to talk about the struggle you can have sometimes with a mentor, and not the struggle being bad, but the struggle being you not being prepared, because I wasn't prepared. So from my meeting last week with my mentor, I thought I would switch it up and really focus up on the things that you should share, hey, dashboard, on the things you should be sharing with your mentor. So let's talk about that. First, share your goals with your mentor. And I know oftentimes they're like, Well, I just want to go talk and kind of get some information, see who I can, who they can connect me with, who they know how they can get me ahead. But if they don't understand what you're trying to achieve, they may be leading you down the wrong path. They may be connecting you with the wrong people, you in your mind think that you know what is best, but they may actually from their experiences in their connections, have somebody better for you. They may have some other resources that can help you move ahead in your plans and goals. 

Yes, that's number one. The second thing you need to be sharing with your mentor is your struggles. Oh my god, are you struggling with managing your team? Are you struggling with meeting deadlines? Are you struggling with a new software, a new system? Are you struggling with, I don't know your boss, your manager. Whatever that struggle is, or struggles are, share those with your mentor, get his or her feedback on things that you can do to get through the struggle, what actions you can take, what resources you can use, because it is truly truly important that you use your mentor to help you grow. They're not there, just to look cute peg our head. But they're really there to help you.

And they're spending their time effort. They're using their personal resources and connections to help you grow in your career as a woman of color STEM professional. Exactly. That is what they're doing. Now, you got to tell them about your struggles. But you also have to accept their help. There's like, but I can do it. Look, ya'll. What happened was, I went to my mentor. We hadn't met in like a month because she's been on vacation. And she had meetings and it was just really hard to meet with her because she's the president, CEO of this company. And so, we met for an hour. She's like, what? So how can I help you? Y'all I didn't have an answer. Like literally, she gets businesses all the time. She talks to people. Exactly. So you have to and I didn't know what to tell her. She was like, Well, yeah, well, this is how I'm doing my marketing. She's like, why I didn't know that. She's like, so when you talk to people when she's a wild give them my brochure. She said, I didn't know you had a brochure. Yeah, so she's asking me what how can she help me? I'm actually looking for a mentor a real estate or financial services. Ooh. Real Estate? Are you looking for somebody virtual in person? Financial Services, I don't know. Real Estate, uh, may have a few people. If you if you tell me what if you want to in person, or if it can be virtual, I might have a couple people who'd be willing to do it. Otherwise, I have to think about it and what kind of real estate are you doing commercial? Are you doing residential? That also helps you and and what and what kind of what are you looking for in your mentor? So I might I might be able to do that. All right. 

So you also have to ask them for help. But guess what you also get Hey, Alan, what's going on? You also get to share with your mentor your wins. And I know so so often in corporate law, well, I'm not going to tell my mentor until I get a new job or that new position or that new array, that new project, no, you are to share with your mentor, your small wins, because what happens is, they can help you leverage those small wins and build momentum behind them. So that you keep building up until you reach guess what the number one thing we started with your goals. So you're going to have to tell them your small wins, like Michelle, what is a small when you present it in front of a client? 

Oh, I do that all the time. But this time you did it by yourself. You set up the meeting, you had everything scheduled ahead of time you coordinated all of it yourself, right? Or maybe it is your first time presenting to the client, that is a win. Are you responsible for now really putting together the detail report that goes internally or externally about your project? Are you managing a team for your project? What are your wins, no matter how small or maybe your boss is out and said, Hey, you conduct the meeting, just send me the meeting minutes. Those are still wins, you need to share those. Now. You're probably like, I don't know about that. You have to share the small wins because they do add up. And you may not understand how to fully leverage running the meeting. Now, when you're tasked with running a meeting, especially if it's over, I don't know, a department a division, a billion dollar project, a $50 million project. take that very seriously, because you are being watched and maybe vetted for something going on? And you don't really think you are and even if you aren't you have to leverage that position. Residential says I want to open my own brokerage here. And here in New York, it's hard to connect with owners. Okay. New York, New York. Okay. I'll see if I can find somebody New York. I don't know, I just heard about somebody on a podcast. But that's a whole other story. Ask around. Okay. So be sure number four, you're sharing your wins. This is truly truly important. And most people do not do this. You need to talk to your mentor about how he or she is mentoring you? Are they meeting your expectations? Are they exceeding your expectations? Is it not a good fit, and you're both wasting your time, because you're not getting what you thought you were gonna get. And you need to have that conversation. 

Because the mentor can be like, Yeah, I completely agree this isn't a good fit, or the MS torque is say, I'm not leading you down that path where I think you need to be as here, you're a bit premature and trying to get there. So I want you to take these steps or do this type of work. So you may have to have a discussion about you reaching your goals and the path they want you to take. Because remember, your mentor is only giving you advice, it's up to you to decide if you're going to take it. In addition. In addition to that, guess what happens? As you're building that relationship with that mentor, he or she could say you know what, you're right is not a good fit. I know somebody else who is a better fit to mentor you. And I've already been talking to that person. I want to talk to you about that today, you will be surprised how when you communicate openly and you're sharing your goals, you're sharing your struggles, you're sharing your wins, right? And you're asking for help. Your mentor will understand whether or not he or she is really able to help you. They're able to direct you they're able to support you in getting what you want to get. I'm just saying. But if you aren't willing to communicate these things, it will not happen. So what is Michelle doing this week, I'll be sending over my marketing plan to my mentor. I sent her my brochure while we were meeting. I will be sending her a pitch email I want to send out so I can do presentations to organizations and I it really in a quiet state area. So I'm gonna go to Georgia. So in Georgia, the Carolinas and North Florida, I might go to Central Florida. I like the beaches. I'm just saying. So what are some of your goals? What are you working on? All right now that you need assistance with, right, what are some of those goals where you're trying to reach people?

So if you're in corporate and you know, for many, you're getting close to your review period. So what we're going to focus on next month is preparing for your annual review. Because you probably have not looked at those goals that you set back in January. If you are a very diligent person and you look at every single month, okay, every quarter, you may find out you have not reached any of them, you have not even touch them. You just wrote something down. We're going to look at what do you need to do to prepare for your annual review? Yes. And next Monday, I will not be on here it is a holiday and I'm going to enjoy the holiday. So if you happen to see some tweets go out, I'm gonna beyond if I am, it is not going to be mentor Monday because I want you to enjoy next week, Monday, if you're in the US, and or if you celebrate Labor Day, take time off, enjoy it, like I'm gonna be enjoying mine. But definitely, definitely enjoy yours. If there are no questions about finding a mentor, about sharing your goals, your struggles, asking for help, because that could seem like something scary. And it's not. The struggle is real. When you aren't asking for help. Make the struggle less real. Yes, make the struggle less for yourself by asking for help by seeking help. And sometimes that help can come in the form of a podcast, a book, a YouTube video, a seminar, and sometimes it can come in the form of a person that you call your mentor. So if you have questions, you need assistance with anything be sure you DM me over on Twitter. And you can also find me on Instagram and linked in as well with the same handle. Everybody. See you in two weeks. Have a great one. Bye