This past weekend, I got to do something I haven't done in a LONG TIME. 

I got to teach. Live. In-person. Locally. 

I hadn't really realized how much I'd missed that. Being in front of a room of people, sharing and engaging, and knowing that what I was doing was directly affecting my local community. 

It's fulfilling to me. 

And during that talk about ethical nonmongamy (I've done this online as well, and have a replay in the Dating Kinky Library), I (of course) also discussed boundaries. 

Because EVERY relationship is better with good personal boundaries, and MANY relationships are MUCH better with good personal boundaries. 

But there is something more that I don't talk about as much. 

And during that talk, it started tickling the back of my brain. 

Because I said, "Comparison is the thief of joy," which you've probably heard, and I went on to talk about what we need in a relationship. Also noting that jealousy is fear that something is being taken away, and that the best way to combat that is to know what is missing or diminishing, and to talk about it. 

And this morning, while I was sitting in front of my blank writing page, it came to me. 

It's important to know not only what you won't tolerate in a relationship, but also what fills you up, makes you happy, and what you want and need. 

Find the full transcript for this episode here. https://datingkinky.com/blog/healthy-boundaries/boundaries-companion-fulfillment-points/